People seek for communication, creation of the relations to find understanding, love, care. But sometimes it happens so that they are puppets. Just begin to manipulate them.
Not all relations give positive emotions. Often communication brings only negative feelings. Psychologists call such communications toxic. If to you not comfortably with the partner, perhaps, you manipulate. Pay attention to the most widespread signs. If at least one of them is applicable for you, it is time to change something.
Emotional blackmail
It is sign of one of the most cruel manipulative tactics. The manipulator plays upon your heartstrings, blackmails, forces to believe that its fate or even the fate of many people depends on your behavior. ""Without you I will be gone" ", " "to me it will be bad and I will get sick" ", " "if you leave, children will very strongly be upset, you will break their life"" - all this phrases which manipulators like to throw away. Extremely cruel forms of emotional blackmail are threats of suicide. It is impossible to give in on such provocations. Once the person reminds that he is responsible for the life. If at least once to follow the tastes, it will be difficult to leave such scenario subsequently. Option of blackmail are also direct threats. ""If you make it, I will leave" ", " "can go, but then will not return any more"" - the people wishing to keep everything under control so speak.
""I do not understand about what you""
Manipulators do not consider that a game in ""I do not understand you"" is a children's trick. Strangely enough, many people are conducted on such provocation. If it is difficult to you to talk to the interlocutor, he constantly leaves from a topic of conversation, pretends that he does not understand about what you, know, manipulate you. Also it becomes to leave from inconvenient subjects, to force you to speak only about interesting to the interlocutor. Your requirements and feelings in this case depreciate. Try to place emphasis on the question, paraphrase a message. And even better minimize such game in some gate.
Shifting of responsibility
Sometimes at communication with ""toxic"" people there is a strange feeling of fault. The mistake was made by the interlocutor, but for some reason you consider yourself guilty. It is one of widespread signs of manipulation. The person just inspires in you that because of your actions there were unpleasant things. Such communication will not lead to anything good. It is better to talk frankly at once or to break off the relations.
Cunning provocations
In communication with the manipulator you will constantly face provocations. Such person needs to cause in you emotions, to beat out from balance, to involve in an unnecessary quarrel. It seems and the reason for a dispute was not, but scandal all the same took place. If you often face it, it is necessary to understand for himself that it is manipulation. Next time will resist to it more simply.
""There is no time to think""
The there is less time at us for decision-making, the better for the manipulator. Such person will constantly push you to rash decisions. It is important to distinguish it in time and not to give in on tricks. Costs few times accurately and to ask not to hurry firmly. In most cases manipulation stops.
""You have something with memory""
One more sign of manipulation - your words constantly call into question. This disgusting trick is based on distortion of events of the past and misrepresentation so that they represented the manipulator to the best advantage. ""As, unless you do not remember that you said about me scurrilous things?"" - the one who wants to keep everything under the control reports. Often manipulators refuse the words and accuse you of bad memory. You should not give in on tricks. If with memory at you everything is excellent, hold the ground. Be sure, you remember things such as they are.
Requests largely
When from you often wait for very much, ask about favors which are difficult for executing, know that manipulate you. It is such syllogism. High expectations do not allow you to relax, force to think of to bringing, to fall face down in dirt constantly. As for requests, here too everything is thought very well over. Without having an opportunity to execute something considerable, you begin to have sense of guilt. And here the manipulator asks about something, but already less large. Somehow to make amends, you at once agree. It from you was also wanted initially.
Constant humiliations
If in the relations you constantly feel small, manipulate you. The partner or just loved one endlessly points to your mistakes, offenses. He can say that ever nothing is impossible to you. Why does he need it? To receive the power over you, to force to believe that he is better than you that all important decisions should be entrusted him.