The conflictness of the teenager is a problem which all parents face. How to parents to endure it with the minimum losses?
Show patience
Even if the child differed in good behavior, then the conflicts in teenage age are inevitable. The child to become an adult, feels the need to declare oneself, tries different ways of behavior. Its circle of contacts extends, there are new interests which can disperse from what is accepted in parental family. Therefore show patience and understanding: teenage age - the difficult period, but it quickly passes!
Establish the reason for the increased conflictness
Teenage conflictness, the phenomenon natural, but nevertheless parents need to understand the conflictness reasons attentively. It will facilitate mutual understanding. Besides, it is important to understand that the teenager himself also can not always understand up to the end what happens to him, without having experience of the adult yet. Therefore parents have to act as experienced mentors and help the teenager to understand themselves.
The reason of conflictness of teenagers often is in their unstable self-assessment, the aspiration to declare oneself and ego-trip. Often the conflictness is reflection of problems in the relations with parents. If in family there is an atmosphere of the constant conflicts, then the child just reproduces this model in the relations with other people. Therefore bringing up and trying to correct the conflict teenager, parents have to realize what example are for the child.
How to communicate with the conflict teenager?
- You teach the teenager to control the negative emotions – anger, aggression. You can, will acquaint him with psychological receptions which will help to control emotions. Also to remove excessive psychological stress sports activities, interesting hobbies and a hobby can help.
- You do not respond to aggression from the child to the same at all, do not dare to communicate with voices raised, to shout at the child, to offend him and to respond pejoratively about is not present.
- Whenever possible, try to leave from the conflict, set an example of finding of compromises, give to the child the chance to get experience of positive and peaceful solution of disputable situations.
- If the conflict already took place, try to calm down, quietly discuss current situation.
- Do not try to look for guilty, both do not try to justify and do not justify behavior of the teenager if on it there are no reasons.
- Discuss conflict situations with the teenager, you do not press on nudely, and try to bring him to understanding of a sovy wrongfulness.
- Form responsibility for the acts at the teenager.
- Be not afraid to apologize if you know that were not right.
In other words, behave from the adult's position, without allowing to involve themselves in the conflict on trifles. Also respect the right of almost adult child for the opinion, at the same time you teach it to reach compromise.