Families which take on education of children from orphan institutions face that the reality is far from their idyllic representations. Foreign child causes in family life discord only the one presence. And the senior generation has to show patience and wisdom that if not to fall in love with it then to accept, help it to cope with new living conditions.
1. Find the reason of your irritation. What it is not pleasant to you in behavior of the child? What acts irritate you? Having understood it, you can talk to the child and softly state the wishes. Let's say it is not pleasant to you that the child spends at the computer, instead of doing homework much time. Accurately designate time when he can play and you watch it. You do not allow any eases even if it can lead to the conflict. Your task to show that in family there is an authority (senior generation) with whose opinion it is necessary to reckon. The earlier the child will adopt rules of conduct in your family, the quicker there will take place him adaptation.
2. During adaptation there are most difficult conflicts between new parents and children. Your task to help the child to join new family, to get acquainted with its traditions and orders. All family members have to be friendly to the child, are ready to help him with the solution of any questions. The child opposite, can behave provocatively, provoking you to scandals and punishments (especially if it was norm in the previous family). So he probes that side to which you can accept his any and after which with you it is already best of all not to joke.
3. Do not make to the child premature demands. Besides adaptation consider also psychological features of the child. If it is the child from orphanage, the increased reserve, an edinolichnost, isolation can distinguish it. You can face problems of the household plan. But at the same time such children are more disciplined and well communicate with other children. You should face problems in study, perhaps, some asocial behavior. But to it you should be ready and to understand that such problems — an integral part of adaptation of the child in new conditions.
4. If the small child, his rejection can arise even from, apparently, such trifle as a smell. If you have children, you feel them at the level of an instinct. Foreign child should learn to be loved. To learn. To learn to struggle with fastidiousness and irritation. Many adults try to replace love with pity which in itself is already destructive. The love for the child includes both education, and care of its safety and health, and some restrictions. The pity does not allow you to see a full-fledged picture of the fact that it is really necessary for the child and in what he should be limited strictly.