It seems to newly minted couples that the real family will appear only after appearance of the kid. But men are usually not ready to bring kids at once. In this regard it is necessary to postpone conception for several years. Various factors can affect it.
Why the man against the child
It is important not to forget that men on the nature differ from women a little: they are more rational, more pragmatic, more prudent. And, naturally, especially brightly these qualities are visible in such responsible question as pregnancy. But often arrive at an idea of conception of the child of the woman at the level of an intuition, just once they begin to understand that the kid is necessary for them. Men for considering of the desires and feelings will need time.
On the other hand, when planning pregnancy at men also the emotional component can join. At the same time they begin to be afraid of changes which will happen to his beloved, changes of already settled way of life of family, shifts in intimate life and in the attitude towards him.
Something bigger disappears in any situation behind unwillingness of the spouse to have the child, than just refusal to take care of the kid. The man begins to understand that appearance of the new family member completely will change his prompt life.
How to work if the husband does not want the child
Great number of men, thinking of appearance of the child, represent a set of diapers and sleepless nights. In this regard there is a fear. In order that the spouse managed to overcome own fears, the wife needs to talk to him quietly. Persuading the husband that the birth of the child is just necessary, it is important to emphasize as often as possible that life can become better and to it it will be given as much attention, as before. Also it is recommended to communicate with families where there are already children more often. For this purpose it is possible to come for walks together with children of friends or relatives. So the husband will be able to see that he together with kids can be cheerful too. It is not necessary to resort to deception at all. You should not convince the spouse that with pregnancy, it is possible to cope with hormonal failure and a set of dirty diapers easily. You should not deceive also that, despite of pregnancy, you will remain desired and harmonious, as well as before incubation of the kid. It is the wrong tactics of behavior. In that situation if the man reasoned the unwillingness to conceive the kid with the fact that the family has insufficiently safe financial position today, the careful analysis of this information is necessary. It is necessary to reject all the emotions, desires and ambitions. In a quiet situation it will be required to discuss the existing family problems with the husband and to try to find the most optimum ways for their decision.