The child who grew up in orphanage differs in special behavior and the attitude towards people around. Adoptive parents have to find approach to the new family member. For this purpose many efforts will be required.
To regain the trust
Adopted children have bitter experience of treachery from adults. One of the first tasks of new parents – to gain trust of the child. Only having returned faith in people, adoptive parents will be able to find a common language with the little person.
Before taking away the child, adults need to prepare the room for him. It will be better if it becomes the certain nursery. So the child will have the personal space. It will allow it to adapt to new conditions quicker. Besides, the child will understand that waited for him in this family. It will become an important factor for the kid.
For gaining trust at the child in communication try to be near on a position. At the same time always keep the promises. It will allow the child to trust you.
In the course of acquaintance to the child find out what hobbies at it that it is interesting to it. It will help to equip the nursery. Suggest the new owner of the room to take part in the organization of space of the room. Grant it the right to choose color of walls, furniture, curtains. So you will show that you trust it an important issue. In addition, participation under repair will help the child to get used to new family quicker. At once treat the adopted child as to native. It will help to defuse tensions in the relations between you. Besides, so you will show gravity of intentions in relation to the child and be credible from his party. Never deceive the adopted child. Having once deceived, you will hardly manage to regain his trust once again. You do not become the people who once again betrayed children.
Together on life
To become the friend to the reception kid, communicate with him, as with the companion. Penetrate into its games, meet his friends. Do not show great importance of the affairs, than nurseries. Make him the first assistant. Try to hold all-family events in common. Let in your family there will be traditional holidays, dates. Preparation for them, carrying out, the general memoirs – all this unites family members, does them closer.
Connect the child, as far as possible, to the solution of common problems. In turn, it will help to develop at it responsibility.
Take active part in the child's life. Be interested in its affairs, plans. Express joy apropos even the smallest success of your pupil, encourage him. So the child will feel protection and your support. Give support to the adopted child even then when he grows up. Your help and will be necessary further for him. In that case you will remain really dear people.