How to bring up the child without shouts and punishments

How to bring up the child without shouts and punishments

Whether it is possible to raise the voice on the child and to punish him? It is a question always caused and continues to cause a fierce controversy. Someone is sure that not only it is possible, but also it is necessary, refers to own example: "Parents both shouted, and punished, but for my advantage! And I grew up the good person". Others claim that it is possible to resort to shouts and punishments only in extreme cases if the child strongly was guilty. And someone considers that on children it is impossible to raise the voice at all and to raise a hand. Whether it is so possible to bring up the child without shouts and punishments?

Why parents shout at the child

Main task of parents: to become for the child the true authority. Increase in a voice and punishment in most cases – sign of lack of pedagogical abilities at the father and mother, their inability or unwillingness to achieve love and respect of the child. If parents in the opinion of the kid are not only "absolute protection", but also the highest authority, an embodiment of all kind and light in this world, the child will obey them without hails and the more so without punishments. Just because he loves parents and does not want to upset them.

But in any rule there are exceptions. Besides each child passes through so-called "age crises" when the obstinacy and probability of demonstrative disobedience, hysterics sharply increases. How to parents to keep endurance in such situation?

How to do without shouts and punishments

Any parent who even is most loving, careful and fair, cannot be considered as ideal. Besides, at fatigue, nervous tension, haste, disobedience, whims, especially the child's hysterics strongly irritate. Therefore parents have a temptation to raise the voice on the kid or to spank him. But it is necessary to overcome itself after all. The easiest and effective way of fight against the same hysterics is a demonstrative ignoring. As soon as the kid finds out that his shouts and tears have no effect, he will quickly calm down. Some parents resort to more radical, but also – leave to very effective way the child in the empty room with words: "And now think why so it is impossible to behave". Someone at the first signs of a hysterics washes the kid cold water. It is possible to behave differently, the main thing is not to resort to corporal punishments. After the child calms down, it is necessary to explain accurately and clearly to him that his behavior was inadmissible and distressing for parents, but they still love it and hope that he will not be capricious so any more. When the child reaches such age that begins to understand the parental argument, it is necessary to explain in detail to him point of your bans, restrictions. That the kid knew that mom and dad forbid it to do something not of harm but because it is dangerous to his health, for example. Also remember that shouting at the child, you will achieve not that result at all! Yes, it is possible, he will cease to demand the desirable, to cry, but you will not gain authority.

Author: «MirrorInfo» Dream Team