So far exists though some statistics of stains between spouses, parents should explain the regrettable fact of absence with a number of the father. How it will be made by mother and other relatives, in many respects can affect attitude of the child, his self-assessment and the hollow and role relations in the future. Therefore it is necessary to approach a conversation about the father most responsibly and with great respect for the former spouse what between you happened.
Instruction
1. You tell the truth in a form, available to the child. Even the child has to know about a tragic event and during the different age periods to have an opportunity in own way to comprehend it. You should not deceive the child and to feed him with expectations of return of the father, the child will mature and will begin to understand a lot of things and without you, and the offense at mother for deception will sit down a needle at subconsciousness.
2. Tell the child about how the love began and what between you there were good relations. That he was a desired child in family and everything including dad, it was looked forward. It somewhat will warm the soul of the child, will facilitate his experiences. In a detail of how these relations deteriorated, it is not necessary to press, it is better to confine to a short phrase that began to quarrel often and could not live together further.
3. Cite as an example the acquaintances to explain a situation to the kid. Or his peers to show differences between people. Children since three-four years already understand as far as they different, for example, are pleasant to them some children and others are not pleasant. It is a good support for an explanation of not similarity of characters of mom with dad. But you should not blame it of the father, explain the fact of a difference of people as a reality.
4. Tell about the incident frostily, but it is attentive, yours faithfully to the father and love for past experience. It was your experience, and as a result you had a precious treasure. Therefore gain wisdom and strength to appreciate in yourself the event. Do not unburden the heart at all and do not show the offense, rage and any other negative at the father. Thus you will cause only sense of guilt for your relations in the child, but to love the father as that is demanded by the nature of the kid, the child will not cease.
5. Explain to the child that absence of the father not an indicator that it is lonely or less loved, than other children. Do not try to give out of fault to the child more, than it is given to other children, - super-guardianship, performance of any whims – already surplus. Just show how you love it as his grandmothers and grandfathers love, embrace more often and pay attention, listen to the child and talk to him.