The love even to own children not always comes at once. And what to tell about others or reception. But in these cases the adult has to show wisdom and patience and to find in the heart the place for each child.
1. Situations when together with you nonnative children begin to live, there is a lot of. It can be children of your spouse from other marriage, nephews or the adopted child from orphanage. And all of them want to see in you if not mom then the adult who respects and accepts them. And you have to take this situation for granted as inevitability. Only you will be able to create the correct microclimate which first of all depends on the relations with children in family.
2. If you already have own children, then, of course, you should learn to love all children equally. It is not simple, considering that other people's children can irritate you just with the fact of the presence. But try to observe balance concerning all children so that the family did not see the competition, and others did not feel like strangers. Do not allocate some children before others, do not overpraise, but also you do not keep a tight rein. Help children to build up equal partnership among themselves. In their conflicts do not look for right and guilty, so you only aggravate a situation.
3. Try to spend with children more time together. For the child new family a huge stress. Be sensitive, do not climb to the child with unnecessary inquiries – he does not trust you yet. But do everything that this trust to deserve. Sincerely be interested in affairs and hobbies of the child, encourage them, find common interests. So you will be able to understand better inner world of this child, and you will have an occasion to be proud or be happy for it. And it is already small step to new feeling.
4. Find positive sides in the child. Perhaps he perfectly studies and pleases you with good marks. Or as nobody helps you about the house. The child in turn too wants to deserve your good attitude. Children are younger try to please you, teenagers, on the contrary, express it protests. With them it is necessary to be the most correct and at the same time to let know that such behavior in family is unacceptable. Intimidation of the teenager that it will deprive of something necessary or, what is even worse becomes a mistake of many parents, will return to former family or a shelter. You have to gain authority of the child the fact that you are not afraid of difficult tasks.
5. You nobody forces to show open feelings. Not at all adults well it turns out to express love and for the own children. It is not necessary to force with a great effort itself, children perfectly feel falseness. For a start you should cope with offenses and irritation which children can cause. And if you learn to suppress negative emotions, not to look for reasons for cavils and scandals over time you will be able to call this child own.