"Do not climb, you are not able". How often similar words it is heard at playgrounds. Any psychologist just shudders, hearing it. And how the child will learn to ride a bicycle, to climb on the Swedish wall, to ride the scooter if it is constantly stopped?! Behind such phrases the fear of parents or grandmothers (them even more) for health of the kid is. In other words is a hyper guardianship of adults, not persons interested to release the son or the daughter in independent life
Experiences of mothers and fathers for life of the children amplify in case there was already an experience of serious injuries. Of course, not everyone breaks to themselves bones or get concussion in the childhood. But there is at all no person who at development of new skill would not tear off knees or would not get bruises. But parents forget about it or want to save the kids from everything.
From hyper guardianship rather serious consequences for mental development and for physical health of the child follow. He gets used to think of himself as weak and weak. The kid will wait until he is removed from a short flight of stairs or helped. And if there are no adults nearby - will fly from there head over heels. In psychology the similar phenomenon has the name – a syndrome of the learned helplessness. The person studies to be weak and dependent. It is easy to present how hard to the person in adulthood with a similar syndrome.
Curiosity of people - the strongest engine of their development. Sooner or later the child all the same will get on the bicycle or will climb there where it is forbidden. The forbidden fruit, as we know, is sweet. At the same time the formula is accurately fixed in a brain of the child that it dependent, inept also has no chance to something to learn. As a result of training do not wait. Similar attempts will come to an end most often with injuries, that is what adults were afraid of.
For a start it is important to realize the fact that I as the parent slow down development of own child, stopping it in new actions. Everything is studied gradually. Nobody (except for strongly gifted people) learns to all and at once. It is better to paraphrase the fear for health of the kid in permission with restriction: it is possible to climb on the Swedish wall, but not above the second step; gets on the bicycle better at the moment, but so far it is held, etc.
The independence zone at the same time needs to be increased gradually: itself climbed on a short flight of stairs, itself get down, for example. It is important to allow the baby "to fill own bruises and cones" in admissible safe conditions. Let he will better be scratched and will understand how it is correct to carry out movements, than rasshibtsya then.
Each parent should be reconciled with the fact that the child gradually moves away. The distance between him and mom steadily increases. To the baby the adult is vital every minute, and here to the teenager already only sometimes in the evenings. In order that the child grew healthy and inquisitive, it is necessary to help him to find independence gradually and at the right time.