Treason of darling cracks in the relations which after some time can turn into the huge abyss which forever divided you and it. However it is possible to try to find forces to overcome the occurred mistake and to cement the formed gap.
Instruction
1. Calm down and analyze the incident without strong emotions, take a detached view of a situation. If changed you, think why it occurred whether there is in it also a share of your fault? Perhaps, you paid not enough attention to the second half, were with it or with it are rough, unfair, cruel? Perhaps, you showed not enough respect or love, as pushed your husband or the wife on such step? Perhaps, treason is a revenge to you for something or a call for help, sign of psychological problems, sincere trouble of your partner? Remember that any act has certain reasons therefore you do not hurry to label the person who was guilty before you.
2. Quietly talk to darling who changed to you. If you understood that in this situation there is also your fault, tell him about it. Ask forgiveness that, for example, found not enough time for the partner, promise that from now on you will behave differently. With all the heart forgive him, with the beared malice it will be difficult for you to restore the normal relations.
3. After clarification of the reasons of the incident, ask the husband or the wife whether he (she) sees the further prospects of development of your relations? If your second half is interested in restoration of the relations, pass to further actions for marriage strengthening.
4. Do not come back in a talk to treason, abstain from reproaches, do not discuss and do not condemn this act with other people, you forgave darling. You should not strengthen behind it control, you do not seek to limit its freedom, your relations, as before, have to be under construction on full confidence each other and mutual respect. Yes, it is difficult, but otherwise you will never get rid of a treason shadow over your marriage. Correct also the behavior if it was the reason of treason.
5. If you changed, wait until emotions of your partner cease, try to talk quietly to him, to explain the reasons of your treachery. Do not lie and do not try to shift the blame on others – hocused, tempted, etc., better recognize own mistakes and promise not to allow them from now on. Tell that you learned a valuable lesson from this situation that you understood how you value your relations. Certainly, all this is appropriate only if you really want to keep marriage.
6. Do not try to pray for forgiveness every day your fault armfuls of flowers and expensive gifts, do not accept a role of guilty, do not do what was not peculiar to you earlier. So you will constantly remind darling of the treason and to arouse at him only irritation and mistrust. Behave naturally: open genuine feelings, warm words without flattery and a lie, your honesty and devotion to family – all this will be surely estimated.
7. If you feel that you do not love your spouse or the spouse, honestly tell him or her about it. Trying to restore the relations for the sake of respect for the standard decencies, continuing to lie and play the hypocrite, you will even more get confused, and your marriage will collapse irrevocably sooner or later.