Children usually endure family breakdown sharply. In particular if parents after the divorce cannot decide in any way with whom it is better for child to live. Cases when the court takes into account first of all material resources of one of parents, are not so rare. Meanwhile it is better to resolve this issue peacefully that the child understood that both parents still love it that they remain for it mom and dad in spite of the fact that do not live together any more. Many children's psychologists consider that it is better for child of preschool and younger school age to live with mother. Of course, if she does not lead an asocial life.
It is required to you
- - the conditions allowing to provide to the child normal training and development.
Instruction
1. The court quite often makes the decision in favor of that parent at whom it is better material resources. Of course, the judgment has to be made first of all for the benefit of the child. But the court is obliged to consider a situation from different sides. Convince court that the child has sufficient conditions for normal development.
2. Try to resolve an issue peacefully. Agree with the child's father that the kid will live with you. Discuss where he will study and on what conditions. Very much can be that the father will agree to pay a part of classes or in general will undertake training of the child. Unfortunately, there are fathers to whom the child, how many an opportunity to salt his mothers is important not so much. Let know that such number will not pass in your case and try to convince the ex-husband that the interests of the child — first of all and that the material aspect of business not always is decisive.
3. Bring order to the apartment. It not necessarily has to be in your property. It can be municipal housing where you are a tenant, the departmental or private apartment and even the room in the hostel. The child has to have a separate bed and the place for games and classes. To allocate a corner where the kid will store the toys and books, it is possible even in very small room. Accustom the child to keep things in an order. Certainly, you have to set it a good example.
4. Get support of kindergarten teachers or the school teacher. In case of a disputable situation they can be invited in court as witnesses or suggest them to write characteristic on your child. They will need to specify conditions in which there lives a kid, as well as in what look it goes to school or a garden in characteristic. Usually with it problems do not arise because teachers write what is seen. Try that the child always looked tidy that he had enough clothes and linen and that everything was in good condition.
5. Prepare that the staff of the commission on affairs of minors or the inspector on protection of the rights of the child can visit you. In case of the serious conflict with the former relatives it is almost inevitable. Try to make a pleasant impression on them. Do not forget to ask documents. Do not allow to come into the room in street footwear. Having suggested visitors to be undressed, you solve two problems at once: you will show that you are a mistress of the situation and you will let know that it is accepted to keep in your house order.
6. Spend guests on the apartment, tell how there lives the child, show a corner with toys. You can ask to open the fridge. There always have to be products. But do not allow strangers to climb there self-willedally. Behave quietly and surely even if uninvited guests will try to take away the child. Prevent it quietly, but it is firm.
7. The main — get support of the child. With it usually there are no problems if you really pay him enough attention, you are interested in its affairs. Even very small children perfectly understand the relations of adults. The kid cannot just present that it is possible to live without mom even if other relatives have a big good apartment and many things. Explain to him what he has the right to solve with whom to it to live. However the senior preschool child or the school student can already quite assess also the consequences of the decision. Anyway the child will estimate that you granted him option, and it increases your chances.