Communication and joint games between children are not always serene and joyful. Often parents become witnesses of the rough conflicts, trials and even fights. The first motivation – to take a situation in hand and any way to nullify a quarrel, but at more sober reflection any loving parent will understand that so the situation cannot be resolved, more intelligent and deep approach is required. It will be useful for fathers and mothers to know how to resolve the conflict between children if it arose and in what situations it is better not to interfere with the events.
The children's conflicts differ in the fact that they serve as way of knowledge of the world and an opportunity to present themselves. By trial and error small children try to understand and find the place in life and society. At the beginning all this occurs unconsciously and at the level of an intuition. Parents have to solve, how seriously to them treat the conflicts between children – it will help to put since early years in the child ability to communication and the solution of disagreements.
What to do to parents when children quarrel
Not it must be assumed that all offenses and quarrels between kids will be resolved by itself. Children so impartially show the emotions that they are not capable to control them without the aid of parents. But if the task of adults is to grow up the independent and sane personality able to behave in collective, then intervention in a children's game has to be rather tactful and not pose psychological threat. There are several key moments to which it is worth paying attention at resolution of conflicts between children.
1. The lack of objectivity is a main reason which can induce the adult to draw incorrect conclusions. Learn to depart from the world of own likes and dislikes, you do not treat the kid slightly worse only because it seems to you the tease or the prankster.
2. The problem of personal space can even part adults on different sides of barricades. Accustom children from the first days to respect of others and own territory. It concerns in total a personal corner, toys, things, ware (if it is accepted in family). However the concept of property does not mean that it is impossible to take others toys or to give the to another. Children should be taught from the early childhood to kindness, solidarity, to develop in them desire to do pleasant to another, and it is gratuitous. "I will not give the conflicts which develop because of - give", it is necessary to pacify without noise. Sometimes it is useful to distract children from the section of property, and later to discuss with them this problem.
3. It is not necessary to underestimate the children. They successfully solve many conflicts. Sometimes it is useful to become the outsider and not to interfere with succession of events (it is only about situations which do not pose threat for moral and physical health). If the quarrel escalates, it is possible to take an interest quietly whether the help is necessary to kids. Usually they ask about others intervention of adults by complaints and tears or, on the contrary, prefer to resolve everything.
As adults can resolve the conflict between children
In any situation the task of parents is to teach children to cope with vital disorders and discontent concerning the events. And it is necessary to do it while they small, and the authority of the adult is still rather high.
Ideally during children's trials and disputes the adults have to remain passive intermediaries who the considered words put children's emotions on the right track.
1. Open for kids of an eye on what happens in their noisy company. Let everyone will depict a situation as he sees it. Often innocent sneers and insults can become a psychological trauma for the rest of life, and at timely intervention of adults of it it is possible to avoid.
2. Furnish to children the clue to solution of the problem, let for a start everyone will offer the option of resolution of conflict. If an exit is not found joint efforts, quietly tell that the game is over and if children are interested in its continuation, then have to come to a reasonable compromise, for example, to concede each other.
3. Suggest children to establish new rules which will help to avoid disorders in the future. If you managed to solve in common one conflict, set result, surely praise a contribution of each child to success of common cause.
You remember impressionability of kids: minutes of the furious conflicts switch their emotions to something else - not less bright and impressionable. Later, when the heat will cool down, remember the past and discuss a problem which took place some time ago. Do not neglect everything, do not pretend that nothing was.
To resolve the conflict between children, understand position of each child, look at the world his eyes, remember the childhood, do not disregard tears and reproaches, the vulnerability of children's soul leaves a mark for the rest of life.
Look at acts of kids. Everything that they know and are able to do, is presented to them by ourselves and if in behavior something guards you, take a closer look, perhaps, it is only a response of your own behavior.
And the last, but the most important: you give to children feeling that they are team. Let naprokaznichat, got naughty, but if you felt that at this moment between them the unity arose, recede. Let they even a little overstepped the limits, but the fact that children together, most of all has to please.