The most important is to learn to communicate with the teenager as equals. Let him not always understand that you want to inform it, but to explain it it is necessary exactly as as if you are sure of its ability everything to realize and to analyze. Thereby you induce the teenager "to reach" the level of communication of adults, and it is very much appreciated by 13-15-year-old.
1. Address the teenager validly, it is better to replace threats with a conditional and bonus way of the arrangement. for example, instead of a phrase "You will not go outside while in the room a disorder" use "You Will Go for a Walk Surely, Only at First Remove at Yourself the Room" option.
2. Teenagers hate long moralizing notations. In this regard use phrases requirements and phrases reminders and express them in short, it is more preferable to an impersonal form. It is not necessary to tell how you were tired to remind him that it is necessary to prepare lessons of literature still constantly. Resembling enough to glance to the room and to remind: "Literature".
3. The same concerns usual daily affairs – make out all statements most accurately, briefly, quietly. And surely give to the teenager time for the return reaction – at this age children are not always capable to react instantly, as generates a lot of the conflicts. There will pass 5 minutes – and the beloved child already itself, without reminders, will implement all clauses planned by you.
4. At communication with the teenager always and everywhere keep calm. Do you want him to become cleverer and more judicious? In that case do not dare to fall to its level, to shout and lecture it, and especially to call. Teenagers are extremely vulnerable, reaction of disobedience and aggression at this age often does not pursue the aim to make any really aggressive action, and serves rather a self-defense – behind impudence the yesterday's child hides the vulnerable soul. Therefore in conflict situations just give time to the teenager – keep silent, go to the neighboring room, having expressed desire to continue a conversation in quiet tones. The useless aggression which is not finding response leaves over time and gives way to more constructive ways of behavior.