Annually in Russia refuse 10,000 children. For today the account of the kids thrown in orphanages goes on hundreds of thousands. But some of them in the true sense of this word are lucky, and they get to foster homes. And only it seems that everything at them becomes cloudless. Actually foster homes face a large number of problems. And how they will cope with them, influences all further life of the child in this family.
The adopted child is a huge responsibility. He is not a pink-checked angel who is pleasant for squeezing and cherishing. In fact the thrown kid from the first days feels the uselessness. Nobody takes him on handles, gently rocks to sleep and nurses. And such trauma remains with him for the rest of life even if he was adopted literally in a month. The main difficulties which foster homes face as skilled adoptive parents speak, are connected with psychology. And both children's, and parental. When mother independently bears the kid of 9 months, and then passes through all birth pangs, at her at the natural level processes of love and care which it is accepted to call a maternal instinct are started.
With adopted children this process takes place in a case by therefore the attachment and warm feelings should be developed in itself by effort of will during certain time. Not and there are a lot of adoptive parents who instantly like unconditional love for the reception kid.
The first feeling which pushes the person on adoption is, of course, a pity. It is worth presenting that the little man (and it optional there has to be a baby) suffers alone in state establishment as heart is already broken from pain and a despair. And further laborious and hard work has to follow. For this reason potential adoptive parents need to pass special school where will explain them a number of processes, will teach interaction options with the child and will give the mass of other useful and valuable information. The adopted children not always at once make contact. In the new place they look round, then they begin various crises. They as well as house kids need to pass through understanding that there are borders, a framework, they have to learn to interact with society correctly. Besides, the children who once endured treachery, not such open for the world any more. That their heart thawed and became warmer, a lot of caress, cares and work is necessary. And quite often happens so that adoptive parents do not cope and return the kid in orphanage. But such act is even worse, than what was made by biological parents. The child is betrayed for the second time when he only managed to restore trust to people. One more problem which adoptive parents face is health of the child. In the majority the children's home children have the whole bouquet of diagnoses. Also it is connected first of all with the fact that were not engaged in them as it is done by mothers. Therefore often right at the beginning the family should fight against diagnoses "lag in development", "the insufficient speech", "hyperactivity" and even "idiocy" which is appropriated to quite healthy children. It is no secret that in a year of life in family children change cardinally, and remove the most part of diagnoses from them. Cases when kids with a sentence of "cerebral palsy", getting home, completely got rid of problems with movement are known and became even dancers. Naturally, among problems which the foster home has it is possible to call also finance. Money for correction, additional classes for restoration of any given functions of the child, etc. catastrophically is not enough for training. The state determined the sum of grants, but they so small and ridiculous that it is even difficult to call them the help. Therefore the family which decided to take the kid needs to think over in advance what to count on and where they will take on it money. The most important that is required to a foster home - it is love and patience. Without these two feelings it will be very difficult. It is necessary to pass through a lot of things, to stand and keep. The gratitude for it will be invaluable – sincere love and happiness of the grown-up child.