"I do not want these boots! I do not want to play the piano"! How often do you hear these words from the child? It is worth understanding the reasons of such behavior and to understand that insisting on need to be engaged in things which it is difficult for small child to understand parents are not always right …
1. Whether we are adequate in the claims? For the child it is very important to defend the opinion. Listen to it. For example, you ask and demand to remove the first game consistently to start following, and the kid has other idea: he intends to unite them and to continue to play with already new, to them made.
The dispute in this case is inevitable. He will protest against your decision and to defend the, in this case it is necessary to ask it the question "why?". Perhaps, his arguments will be quite powerful and you change the point of view. Be not afraid of it.
2. Choice of parents or child? Still many parents and experts, have various approach to this question. Of course, the parental will takes place to be and even if the choice of parents is justified by the fact that these professions can be useful in the future, and to the child not to understand why to it to be engaged in these unclear things, you always should overcome resistance. Here it is possible to assume such decision (in case you after all insisted on the). If the child makes progress, then the choice of parents is justified. There are abilities, and it is worth putting efforts in occupation. If progress insignificant, means the child has no desire, and, perhaps, and necessary qualities. The most difficult is to estimate abilities and if they were shown by means of the child, it is necessary to help to develop them. 3. Who loves orders? And you love when order you? That you answered if you heard in the address: "The leu on a plate is more than liquid for ware. Ta-ak to, wash away better, you see, dirt remains!". At best, if your emotional state remains at the previous level, you will answer: "If you know how it is better, here and do!" Many children, as well as adults, do not love instructions. They, maybe, are also ready both to make a bed, and to wash the dishes, and to make lessons, but the condition of irritation of parents suppresses them, and they begin to go obstinate. Avoid critical remarks until business is executed. 4. To hold the ground! It should be taken into account 2 psychological periods when the child is ready to defend the opinion. The first is "crisis of three years". "Does not want" just because cannot agree with what to it is offered by parents. This time of training of character so just have patience. The second wave — the growing period (teenage), time of definition of the place in society. The child needs to give more independence and an opportunity to make at least a part of decisions most. In this case the teenager is responsible for them and argues with parents only in fundamental issues, and the considerable volume of silly quarrels and whims will disappear over time.