At early age each of children above all in the world loves and appreciates the mother. Even if she is cold with the child even if she threw him, even drinking, angry and shouting – the child loves the mom unconditional love. But when the child grows up, he begins to distinguish bad from good and realizes that his mother was not the best in the world. Then the person can like to her if not hatred, then at least hostility. What to do to the one who does not love the mother?
1. Know that if you do not love the mother, then it is the best of all not to do this fact by a public domain. In society the opinion that whatever was the mother who gave life to the person – bitchy, despotic dominates, drinking or simply hating the child – mother anyway needs to be loved, just by definition. Certainly, you are not obliged to force themselves to love the person to please to public opinion, but also to declare publicly the dislike for the woman who gave birth to you, is not necessary too if you do not want to pass strange, stale and ungrateful.
2. First of all, admit at last to yourself that you do not love the mother. If you even alone with yourself continue to represent the loving child, then the huge amount of your vital energy is spent for maintenance of this role. Discrepancy of what is felt by the person and what he is forced to broadcast to the world sometimes lead to fits of anger and scandals. Call things by their proper names – at least mentally – and you will at once feel how it became easier for you.
3. Understand that you have the right for to loving the mother, and try to get rid of sense of guilt about it. Your hostility to the woman who gave birth to you is for certain proved and in order that you ceased to love it, not one day absolutely was necessary. Any adult instinctively ceases to have sooner or later warm feelings to the torturer, and it is absolutely normal and natural process.
4. Know that it is rather frequent for normalization of the relations with mother and constructive communication between you enough only to cease to live with it under the same roof. If you still did not part and live in one apartment, then it is natural that constant presence of the person irritating you leads to abuse and scandals. Being at distance from mom, you can treat more objectively all her words and acts and to try to accept at last her such what it is. Anyway, ideal people do not exist and nobody is obliged to meet expectations of other person. Any can make a mistake, and forgive here it and not remind of it the being infinitely able only generous and advanced personality.