For parents of teenagers one of the hottest topics – about what to speak with the teenager that he heard you, and you are him.
The first and most important governed is to speak with the teenager about him
The teenage age is time when in life of the child there are changes, also the child – physically and mentally, his attitude towards himself and people around changes. The teenager stays in search of the "I", the identity. Therefore it is important to discuss with the teenager of his feeling, the happening changes, to help to understand themselves, to master a hormonal and emotional storm. At the same time it is important to talk not tone of morals and notations, and to become the wise adviser and the friend who can be trusted. Talk to the teenager about in what he is interested – about his hobby, favourite music, books, movies, computer games. Show sincere interest in what is told by the teenager, try to plunge into his world, it will instantly distinguish affected attention from the present.
But at the same time, the teenager should not try and climb in soul because "I am a mom, and you have to me tell everything". Also, having received the admission to the world of hobbies and experiences of the teenager, do not try to remake it after the own fashion and to establish the rules – differently you will ask to be removed. At this time the person tries to be independent therefore, it is possible that the child not to all will tell you. It is necessary to reconcile to it. Understand that it not manifestation of falsity, stealthiness and becomes "on the evil" to parents. Just the child matured, he realizes and establishes certain borders, protecting the fragile newborn identity.
The second category of subjects - about what the teenager wants to learn about
And it first of all, subjects of sexuality, relationship of floors, contraceptions. Kind of a talk about it was not difficult for some parents, but education in such important and delicate questions you should not be trusted only "street". It will allow to save the teenager from many risks and problems and will help to improve your relations. If you wait from the teenager of frankness and trust, then taboo subjects should not be.
And the third – you say about yourself
The teenage age is the period when the person begins to estimate crucially the parents who were an indisputable ideal earlier. Do not hope – to hide behind a mask of an ideal and to suppress the teenager the authority at you not to turn out. Learn to recognize mistakes, you share with doubts, and, above all – the successful experience, the teenager lacks it so. So you will be able to approach and become the friend and the adviser to the child, and will be able to keep this trusting relationship for the rest of life.