In society there was a stereotype long ago that women love out of pity more strong. Whether so it actually and whether it is worth loving the man "so"?
It is good when the woman supports the man and gives him self-confidence, but, on the other hand, beginning to lisp with it, it suppresses his internal machismo, provokes at it behavior of the small child.
Psychologists consider that all men can be divided into two categorical types conditionally:
- "iron knights" — strong in spirit men who never and allow to show to nobody pity in relation to themselves;
- "little boys" — such men look for an occasion all the time to complain.
In all women the maternal instinct therefore it is no wonder that the majority chooses "weak" men who need support, care and open manifestation of love is put. But it does not mean at all that strong men do not need all this. Just they are held more down in the emotions, do not show the true desires even to themselves.
The pity is a peculiar expression of psychological assistance to the man. And strong usually helps weak. From here and unwillingness of men that felt sorry for them. So the woman shows the force, moral superiority over the man, and it, in turn, is considered for it inadmissible. Therefore it is necessary to be sorry competently, otherwise your actions will cause not gratitude, but anger and irritation. The "real" man willingly will accept the hidden manifestations of pity – help him affairs, be attentive in trifles – give some tea, cover with a blanket in a dream or embrace without cause. But you do not become persuasive at all – it will not be tolerated by any man. Infinite calls, the round-the-clock idle talk and kisses will enrage every minute anyone.
You how nobody else, you know needs of the man – he can loves that his brush stood at the left or that morning coffee was a little cooled down? So make so that it was pleasant to the man, and do not demand gratitude, men in the depressed state sometimes do not notice anybody around themselves. Show patience and just be near. And if you notice that the man really needs pity, then show it affairs, but not words.
If in partners you chose the weak man, then help it to become strong. Do not lisp with it, and you do not praise without cause. Of course, it is impossible to call him the loser too, it is important to estimate his acts and behavior objectively. Do not look for justifications to its failures, and help to correct a situation better. You should not forgive and justify blindly all any, even the ugliest acts.
It is important to remain the woman near the man and not to turn for him into "mummy". Mother you have to be for the children, but not for the husband in any way.