Every new day more and more couples decide to live a civil marriage, without starting a family, without obligations. Guys consider that a wedding – the irreparable step to their lives imprisoning and to some extent they are right. Girls dream to remain young and independent, and it is quite good. But how to be when two do not agree with each other?
Most often women dream of a marriage and security, and men – of freedom and prospects. And lovers, without having reached compromise, disperse, sometimes being sorry about this decision for the rest of the life.
What is family?
Family – one of the most important achievements in human life. And it is good when both understand it. After a while after the wedding the people "get used" to each other and get used to comfort of continued support. Spouses distribute the time, solve where to spend money, divide duties and a bed. Sometimes even after the birth of the child there are no changes in the relations.
It is the most terrible if life becomes boring and gray turns into routine banality. Cleaning of the apartment or joint occupations, walks and hobbies – everything ceases to bring former joy. What does the reason consist in?
"Geography" of family problems is vast, as well as her "arithmetician". The loneliness together, three together, ten together – is unimportant the number of surrounding people, the area of residence, options of difficulties infinite, but a root of troubles always same – impossibility to tell "we" is unimportant. Mistrust, the concealed reproaches, attempts to deceive and use cunning.
The thing is that someone was bothered by the ordinary, and he wishes to reach bigger in life. But it is terrible to admit it, and still confidential conversation about development is postponed, the partner in life becomes more and more heavy "weight" which irritates and allegedly hinders advance. But whether so it?
Stability and habits – happiness changed for wellbeing and comfort which exit from a zone is fraught are the most important for someone... Development? Changes? Changes frighten, especially the women who are usually feeling where heavy responsibility for children, than men.
There is a great definition of love attributed to Saint-Exupéry: "To love — it does not mean to look at each other, to love – means together to look in one direction." it is necessary to go forward, at least for the sake of children, opening new opportunities of the embodiment of any dream. But also stability with comfort can be not lost at the same time. It is possible to find thin balance between vigorous activity and rest if there is a trust, frankness and desire to understand and forgive a mistake.
Do not forget: if decided to rise on a family track, then decide and go on it surely, you study each other, but do not ego-trip at the expense of the partner in life, do not try to solve who is cleverer and more useful, you find common goals and affairs and openly discuss together everything that occurs in life of each loved one, even negative emotions and feelings.
You remember the main thing: in family there are no "I" selfish, the word "we" has to be the main thing. It is the only way to keep the long relations and the trust capable to open before you all shades of happiness, with its fullness sharpness of experiences, alarms, tenderness, cares and love.