"… language dried up, heart is hit so hard what is ready to blow up, and the breast hurts to nausea, it is very difficult to breathe, hands shiver and sweat, in general is unclear where you are, … panic, fear, apparently, will die right now …" - tested something similar when around there are a lot of people, strangers?
Fear of a congestion of people or demofobiya (okhlofobiya), define as constant, pathological and unreasonable fear of crowd. The person is afraid of a congestion of people, without reckoning with understanding of lack of danger, with the opinion of people around confirming it. Fear of people as a phobia, means by itself strongly expressed fear to come under the spotlight, fear of behavior which will embarrass you will force to feel confusion or humiliation. Such fear can be shown as in usual situations – from a simple lunch in cafe or meetings with friends at the holiday table, and in large-scale actions – presence at a numerous meeting or need of your public statement.
Fear of people – very widespread phobia. And types it there is a set. Here a little: fear of people in general – an anthropophobia, societies – sociophobia, men – an androphobia, women – a gynophobia, children – a pedophobia, old men – a gerontophobia. Someone is afraid of bald, bearded, beautiful, ugly people, someone – politicians, priests, prostitutes. There are those which seriously are afraid the mother-in-law or the mother-in-law (penterafoba). Rather exotic forms of fear of people, for example a coulrophobia (fear of clowns) meet, but fear of strangers – xenophobia is more widespread.
If in the foreseeable past you had no case "to catch" such disease as fear of people, then roots of its emergence, most likely, last from the early childhood. And though the reasons of such behavior are still not clear finally, experts agree in opinion that fear of foreign people is a part of healthy development of the child. In ancient times unfamiliar, sounds, smells and furthermore – people, were "not so friendly" as today. And his health and life depended on ability of the kid to use the system of recognition "" and "others". Therefore the nature took care of some kind of protective mechanism – the instinct of avoiding of contact with the stranger is inherent in us. Also it is implemented through fear of communication with people. And here extreme manifestations of such phobia force the person to be afraid of communication not only with strangers, but also with well familiar people.
How to get rid of fear of people?
How after all to get rid of such fear? We live among people, means unreasonably to be afraid of them – to be afraid of the life. Fear of other people, first of all, is not a disease, and rather your personal relation. If you are able to realize it fully, you win against the fear. For this purpose try to understand the reasons of such state. How long you are pursued by fear of people how often this phobia is shown? Be not ashamed to address for the sake of it the expert. Because sometimes it is impossible to operate a disease, the relation – always.
There are some more recommendations:
- Recognize a problem. Do you agree that fear of communication fear of new acquaintances, people – a serious obstacle on your way? Admit to yourself that such problem really exists.
- Formulate a problem. So, you found forces to admit that you are afraid, now sit down at a table, take a leaf and a pencil and formulate it. Write down what you are afraid of. Do you have a fear of congestions of people, fear of a performance on public, fear of strangers? As it is possible describe the phobia in more detail.
- Begin to work on search of the decision. And the decision will come. The best course – to address the expert. Ah and, he is a stranger. It's all right. It is "good", it – "", it can be trusted. But, if you are not ready yet, just think what weapon you would overcome "a fear monster". Try to make the weakness force. For example, arrive as if you are not afraid, and
- you enjoy communication. Every day provides a suitable situation, use it:
- begin to communicate easily, cheerfully and senselessly: have a good time, tell jokes or ridiculous stories in the subway, the bus, in turn. Get acquainted with the first counter girl. Start a conversation in the elevator on the way on the floor. Generally, be not afraid to look "somehow not so";
- try the hand: bargain in the market, in the taxi, ask questions to consultants in shops, protect the interests in "negotiations" with neighbors. Do it quietly, thoughtfully, with interest;
- you treat all this and other communication slightly philosophically. In life there are not enough situations in which the eloquence and courage of the speaker is required. You treat communication with others slightly more freely;
- just purposely force themselves to act this way. It is not necessary to set unreal terms and the purposes. But it will be good if you begin to note the actions. Create "the Diary of Victories" and just you include in it what you consider the achievement.
- Never come back to Paragraph 2.
I trust, you will cope.