Girls are brought up now in traditions which are in many respects brought closer to male traditions of education that, naturally, affects their outlook, feeling and, of course, is shown in behavior.
Let's try to deal with what really happens when the man and the woman meet.
Let's begin with the fact that now it is possible to meet very strange situation. For example, around a certain young man several girls can curl and try to win him "a hand and heart".
He feels as the prince whom all girls chase. Alas, it is not such and a rarity, especially in young years.
Let's think from where there is such behavior model, strange for girls, and what it is fraught with?
The fact is that girls are brought up now in traditions which are in many respects brought closer to male traditions of education that, naturally, affects their outlook, feeling and, of course, is shown at the level of behavior.
The traditional women's model of education is considerably lost and one of the major components forming a female essence is lost. This feeling of the uniqueness and value.
Now the woman is represented to much as the human being which is just differing in a floor from the man. At the same time all the rest at them has to be kind of identical: identical thoughts, identical values, identical aspirations and priorities, etc.
The serious mistake which leads to emergence also consists in it, I will not be afraid of this word, unnatural situations when girls run for young people.
It is a trouble of modern society because such situation just distorts both the female, and men's nature.
Let's look how it occurs.
What does the men's nature and an essence consist in?
The nature of the man is always active actions, it is fight, overcoming resistance, self-improvement and personal growth. The man personifies force which is directed to overcoming itself, to improvement of the qualities and to "gaining" the world.
The female nature represents in some way passivity. The woman does not need to reach something by the nature, to actively seek to win something, to receive or to take control of something (we do not speak about knowledge and self-development now). Any active actions of the woman directed to transformation of the outside world can be considered a deviation from a true female essence.
What do we receive, proceeding from these prerequisites? We receive the following picture: if the woman herself shows the active actions directed to capturing attention and the man's heart, she causes damage as to, and the man.
In this case there is an obvious violation: the active machismo shows passive lines, accepting attention from women and being in the provision of "choosing". The female beginning which nature is passive – on the contrary performs men's functions, i.e. actively influences the outside world. It in a root is wrong, and it is the reason that now there are a lot of womanly men and courageous women.
Active primerivaniye on itself the nature of other biological floor conducts to the fact that reorganization and thinking, and feeling begins.
How does this process naturally, without violation of a men's and female essence have to happen?
The first that each girl and the woman needs to remember always is that she should not battle for the man at all, using persistent men's methods. Even if you take a strong liking for the man or the young man even if it seems to you that he is that only and wonderful prince with whom you are doomed to eternal happiness) – all the same it is not necessary. It is not necessary to come to it to work and to bring a lunch in a plastic container. It is not necessary to call him on 3 times each hour throughout the day and to ask, how it affairs (if very much you want, call 1 time – it quite enough). It is not necessary to write still a chain of sms with any tendernesses. It is not necessary to take away it from work by car and to bring home.
Girls, think again! It is not necessary to run for the man and to try to please him in everything – to these you just relax the man, and it loses the male persistence, commitment and desire to be improved. Always you remember that such actions will lead to the wrong development of the relations therefore all of you will carry out more male role, and it – more and more women's.
And it is necessary to you? Did you want the relations with the man in order that he cared for you, protected, helped you, supported at a difficult moment, truly? Do not you want him to turn into a domestic puppy who lies on a soft small pillow, drinks a milk and which all function comes down to that it was not boring for you? Do you try to obtain not it?
Perfectly, then do not use male behavior model, otherwise you will change over soon, and your relations will go to all pieces. And you just wanted to show care and attention, thinking that it to the best …
Not only that the runnings model for the man is pernicious at creation of the relations, it is pernicious even then when you already married. In a case when you only are in search, it is inadmissible in no shape or form. So you with own hand let the man know that you relieve from him obligations and responsibility for development of the relations and take it in hand.
Men, being beings not always reasonable, quite possibly, will not have anything against such approach, however and from them you at the same time will wait for serious actions. Moreover, if you very much care strongly for the man with whom you are not connected by bonds of marriage yet, then it almost for certain will lead to the fact that he will turn into the exploiter and the consumer.
You showed it the working model: you for it try and do practically everything. He in reply and should not try. I.e. you established such "rules of the game" at which in losers at first there are you, and then and the man.
How it occurs in details, it is possible to write separate article, however the main thing that you need to remember is that not you have to "hunt" for the man, and he has to try to obtain your hand and all the rest. He has to call you and ask, how are you. It he has to write you love sms with tendernesses. He has to come for you by car and bring home.
All place these actions on the places: the woman shows the nature, allowing the man to care and look after about herself, and the man – the: trying to obtain, reaching and making active efforts.