The pubertal period at boys is characterized by their growing interest in the girls cooled by fear to get the heave-ho. How, from the point of view of psychologists, it is easier for boy to be pleasant to the schoolmate, read further in article.
Why it is important for boys
Violence of hormones generates latent desires in the teenager's organism and causes in it hitherto unknown feelings which can quite develop into the first love. But how to inform of it the addressee? The modesty which became in our times a rarity here acts now as a brake seldom. To the forefront there is an elementary fear to be rejected, mocked and plunged into ashes with all the scolded feelings. And children have for this purpose the reasons, though do not understand an essence mind, and feel it intuitively.
And revelry of hormones which does her behavior impulsive, excessively emotional, and sometimes reigns in an organism of the schoolmate and aggressive, jumping up to enchanting fun and being overthrown in sad apathy. In a similar situation to count on proper response to the pure and tender sentiment, really, complicated. And still a lot of things depend also on personal qualities of the darling here, and on the guy who at the correct behavior can minimize danger of rough rejection of the sublime feelings.
Whether you know? According to psychologists, any company from three girls which gathered in any occasion in the course of the meeting inevitably begins to speak about boys.
Whether it is possible to draw attention of the girl who does not notice you
At each girl the personal ideal of the representative of an opposite sex is developed, however all have also certain general criteria by which girls instantly determine whether it is worth spending further the attention for got to the field of their sight of the guy.
Generally these criteria are expressed in:
- neatness of appearance;
- natural, but not ostentatious politeness;
- same gallantry;
- the diligence resulting in obvious success in study;
- cheerful and friendly nature;
- sociability;
- abilities competently and colourfully to express the thoughts;
- ability to keep the word.
At the same time the behavior at communication with the pleasant girl differs in receptions and tactics depending on age. The boy and the girl in 10 years behave not as their senior companions in 14 years though they are divided not so by a lot of time.
Advice to boys is younger
Psychologists advise school students in 11, 12, 13 years:
- To spend time maximum together with the pleasant girl. If she studies better, then the help in explanation of the difficult moments in homework can ask for her. And, on the contrary, it is necessary to offer the help in study if it in it is not so strong. But this offer has to sound extremely correctly and unostentatiously because of hypertrophied maiden sensitivity.
- To make friends with her friends that considerably expands a common ground with an object of sympathy and time of stay in its proximity.
- To come into active contact in social networks, having found for this purpose a mutually interesting common ground.
- To participate in school actions in which the pleasant girl participates that will give subjects for joint discussion.
- To take the girl after school home that to equivalently unostentatious, but intelligible recognition in the feelings which any girl will appreciate.
Whether you know? Fir-trees to make a date with the girl for the evening, she will begin to prepare for it since morning, but all the same will be late for it that does not have a scientific explanation, but that is the standard axiom.
Practical recommendations to guys are more senior
Guys in 14, 15 and 16 years to be pleasant to the girl, have to know the following:
- It is necessary to look natural without strained attempts to resemble someone and someone to seem. For this purpose it is necessary to develop feeling of self-esteem, without rushing to extremes and without departing to transcendental heights. Girls very much appreciate self-assured and reliable guys, but cautiously treat boasters.
- During this period to girls, except verbal expressions of the sympathy or in the form of gentlemen's acts, also gifts which at this stage are valuable not the cost, and just the existence are required.
- Though teenagers like to overthrow any authorities, including also parental, it is not necessary to support the girl when she in a rush of feelings begins to speak unflatteringly of the father or mother. Liking do one business when the parents are scolded by the native daughter who can it, and absolutely other when the harm speaks of her parents the stranger.
- Girls of this age often peck on guys, something won popularity at school. Seeking to get to their ranks, it is necessary to prove in sport, the Olympic Games in various objects, bright participation in school actions, but not drives in police and noisy fights. So cheap authority is capable to captivate only maidens of the similar sincere organization.
- It is not necessary to bring the darling to the level of the princess on a pea, implicitly carrying out any its whim. It is possible to help it and it is necessary, but at the same time it is not obligatory to turn into the errand boy who will not be respected by the girl, certainly, at all.
- It is also not recommended to bare completely the soul before the darling. It is useful to create around the personality a certain aura of innuendo and even mystery that will maintain interest in the girl and desire to solve the riddle arising before it.
Important! Psychologists warn against lies to the girl who is pleasant. Having intuitively recorded a lie, she can put an end to the relations, without waiting for their development.
What mistakes should be avoided
Only the one who does nothing at all does not make mistakes. Nevertheless at relationship with girls and girls there are moments which knowledge will help to avoid absolutely optional mistakes:
- Does not follow, wishing to draw attention to itself, to release stupid jokes in relation to the pleasant schoolmate. Practically all women do not suffer it. The most rare exceptions only confirm the general rule.
- It is not necessary to attract attention attempts to somehow touch the girl, to take away something from her, in other physical ways to try to interest her that, except irritation, will not cause anything.
- It is very silly to prove the courage fights, impudent behavior with teachers and other mischief which actually proves only the low intellectual level which will hardly tempt someone.
- Offering the girl the friendship, it is not necessary to disown immediately from it in a circle of schoolmates.
Important! Extremely dangerously to the tied relations to tell the girlfriend about the certain thought-up familiar girl to make an impression of the effective guy. Sillier difficult to think up mistakes.
Councils of psychologists
As sad to state it, but young persons at the age of 12–16 years are interested in appearance of the boy or young man, than his inner world more. Interest in it arises a bit later. Belong to the outer attractive sides not only the cute person with a well-groomed hairstyle, but also ability to put on, to competently use perfume, eloquence, courage in judgments and in other manifestations, possession of advanced gadgets and all other counters allocating the guy from the general school weight.
At the same time it must be kept in mind that in awkward age the boys and girls so quickly fall in love, as well as lose interest to each other. As psychologists note, the school love very seldom comes to an end with marriage in adulthood therefore, meeting the girl at school, it is not necessary to create special illusions on long duration and gravity of the relations. The overwhelming number of school novels at school also dies. But it does not cancel importance of school friendship at all between boys and girls, young men and girls which not only decorates and enriches their life at school, but also introduces a lot of useful and valuable in adulthood.
Read also how to distinguish love from love.
School days wonderful therefore are kept in mind that were enriched with disinterested and really sincere friendship including between boys and girls which then so is not enough in difficult and tangled adulthood.