Complexity in the relations of the daughter-in-law and mother-in-law, quite widespread problem in most of married couples. To reconstruct the confrontation moments in productive family dialogue, efforts are necessary. Women have to understand what showdowns and a position of competitors, will not result in positive result, and promote more tense situation in family.
Instruction
1. Most often in tension of the relations of the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, the jealousy and love for the same man plays a role, only in the first case is a son, in the second – the husband. For the mother-in-law the fact that at any time the son can meet the woman capable to replace and become main in his life instead of it, brings contradictory emotions. The son's marriage is especially hard transferred by that mother who brought up his one, putting heart and soul and all available means in process of its formation as men. The woman, realizes that now in life of the son other values, new people, other life appeared. Many mothers-in-law in panic are afraid of that day when adult children, start out separate of it.
2. The daughter-in-law for the mother-in-law actually mother just has no competitor applying for her lawful territory and the person than whom is more expensive. A mutual showdown heat the atmosphere in family, than do irreparable harm to mentality of all of participants of the conflict. To bring the relations into the peaceful course and to cease to see in each other enemies, it is necessary to ask itself a question: "That it is more important for me: daily scandals or an opportunity will learn to agree?". It is necessary to understand, tension of the relations in family, leads depression, stresses and also a set of mental disorders and diseases. It is much better to listen to each other claims once again and to try to cope together with them. The daughter-in-law has to show condescension and respect for mother of the husband, having accepted the fact that rivalry between close people is inadmissible.
3. If the mother-in-law has a constant habit to interpose in the matter of family, explain to her that you a separate cell of society and in need of receiving council, you surely address it. Show the interest in preservation of family happiness. Many mothers-in-law like to teach the young people, inept daughters-in-law various councils, morals, including it the direct duty. In this case without excess quarrels and emotions, talk to the mother-in-law, having told that very much you appreciate her care and the help, but you will arrive according to the beliefs. Do not try to perceive advice to the mother-in-law as the next criticism in the address, in practice it can appear absolutely differently, and thus the woman just wanted to express the concern and participation.
4. In the conflict with the mother-in-law, do not implicate the man in women's squabbles at all. Having fenced it from participation in the conflict, you be at the best. Many women try to involve the man, involving him in women's opposition – it is inadmissible as the choice between two beloveds: mother and wife, not absolutely correct. The clever woman, be she a wife or the mother-in-law, will never begin to look for the third, for conflict resolution, and will understand by a conversation independently. Be able to listen to each other, you appreciate the help rendered by the mother-in-law, but you never become the enemy forces directed to destruction of family