How to decide not to get divorced

How to decide not to get divorced

The divorce, as well as wedding, is a noticeable event in life of many people. And if some come to these decisions consciously, others can give in to minute emotional heat and during few days or even hours to try "to burn all the boats".


1. To start everything with a clean slate or not to try to stick together the broken cup how the popular wisdom advises? Definite answer to this question, alas, does not exist - at each couple the history and the reasons for which they once decided to go together, and after a while - "to be let in free floating". However there are also some universal recommendations capable to help to clear the most tangled as it seems at first sight, a situation. According to psychologists if there is at least one thought of canceling already planned divorce, it is possible to try to save the marriage. Other question - whether will be it happy?

2. First of all it is important to understand, than desire to get divorced and whether there are ways to change these factors or to endure them is caused if there was a disaster, for example, treason of the partner. It is quite natural that the husband or the wife who convicted the second half of incorrectness experience the whole range of emotions, thinking of a divorce. However cases when spouses managed to endure it are known, that is the main thing is to understand whether they are capable to keep the relations after any given incident. Sometimes it is worth dispersing for several days that emotions cooled down, and feelings settled, and the mind could already make the weighed decisions. Some are helped also by a banal way of ""sheet of paper"". If to state all pluses and minuses of a divorce in two columns, it is capable not only to help to make the decision on need of a divorce or preservation of marriage, but also will allow to look at current situation from a different angle, having unexpectedly opened new ways or ways of the solution of problems.

3. Also it is worth thinking: if spouses disperse how strong can be a shock? It is necessary to try as it is possible to imagine a picture of future life more accurately: morning, a breakfast, a lunch - without the second half. Having come home after work, there will be already nobody to tell about the lived day, the pleasures and affairs, problems and cares. Of course, there are parents, relatives and friends, but only to it (or it) only one joke managed to help to cope with tension after work and to relieve the tension... If imagined "picture" seems improbable and will even hurt, having forced to suffer, perhaps, the love is still alive in heart of spouses, and it is worth trying "to stick together the broken cup".

4. According to a number of experts, it is impossible to change the person, only if he does not want to make it independently. That is any technique capable in the magic way" to turn the idler and the brawler into the silent and economic homebody, just does not exist. Wishing to restore marriage and to avoid a divorce, men and women are sometimes inclined to make promises, without realizing degree of their feasibility. The aspiration to improve the relations is praiseworthy, however means careful, systematic and laborious work on itself. And a debt of the second of spouses if he decided not to get divorced, give to the half the various help and support on this hard way.

5. Two always are guilty of intra family problems, and it is necessary to solve them through joint efforts. The question arises: in what can the woman who works without cease be guilty and actually "drags" on herself family whereas the husband lies on a sofa in the days without a break? As it is sad, but the wife likewise is responsible for defects, and her mistake that it allowed the spouse so to concern itself. To change current situation very difficult as statistics testifies, but it is quite possible. However the persistence and endurance, and, of course, love can be required. Only in that case it is possible finally to decide not to get divorced and to try to save the marriage.

Author: «MirrorInfo» Dream Team