The relations in marriage are under construction on trust, mutual respect and, of course, love. Treason cannot but shake these bases of family wellbeing. Nevertheless, both partners are able to save the marriage provided that they are ready to make certain efforts for it.
It will be useful to part for some time, to stay at distance from each other, it will help you to understand the feelings and to look at a situation a new view. Visit the girlfriend in other city, live at relatives or have the room in hotel for several days. If changed you, you probably plunged into a whirlpool of emotions. Heated arguments and a showdown can only do much harm more to your relations. Take a timeout.
Describe events which, in your opinion, resulted in incorrectness. It will be useful for both partners to keep a diary. Treason does not arise from scratch. Think whether it became result of your mistrust, constant disrespect or indifference. Besides, surely make the list of merits of your partner and pleasant acts whom it made. It is necessary adequately to assess a situation, without plunging into charges. Be honest with themselves, describing your feelings, thoughts and expectations.
Discuss the incident with your partner. It will be better to make it in the neutral territory, for example, in the park, at restaurant or in an office of the family psychologist. Do not choose bars, the apartment of the mutual friend or the memorable place for both of you. You want to approach a solution in precise mind. At discussion of this unpleasant event the thicket should use a pronoun ""I"", for example, ""I feel thus" "or" "This event forced me to feel..." "If you changed, do not think and the more so you do not say that you understand feelings of your partner. All people different, and besides it is very unpleasant to hear similar statements from lips of responsible for the event.
Address the expert. There is a great number of the family psychologists specializing in marital infidelity. Ask your partner to go with you or visit several consultations independently. If similar consultations are not entered in your budget, find the literature devoted to this subject. Do not lose self-respect. This step is important for both parties. If changed goes on life with constant sense of guilt, the relations are doomed. Offended the party has to try to return self-confidence. It is extremely important to make it before work on the relations. Rediscover for yourself each other. Create new memoirs - go to have a rest, go on a date, find common interests. Remember, at last, why you fell in love with each other!