If from the obedient kid the child turns into uncontrollable and whimsical or fears habitual things, becoming reserved, then these are signs of crisis of 5 years at children. It is possible to endure the difficult period and to cope with it, having kept nerves of parents.
By five years the child mastered the speech and rather well communicates. The kid watches life of adults and tries to imitate parents. Becomes a favourite phrase: "I". However 5-year-old children cannot assimilate fully to adults. Contradictions of reality and desires are explained by crisis approach.
Signs of a problem
Because of disappointments the kid becomes angry, becomes unbalanced and aggressive. Not always it manages to the child to communicate with peers though the kid aspires to it. Rather good level of development leads to increase in quantity of emotions, formation of identity of character. However to control the feelings the kid is meanwhile incapable.
Understanding of by gender results in isolation. The opinion on the world around is followed by imaginations, identification of as persons appears. The child cannot understand either new thoughts, or feelings, the child also does not cope with numerous new hobbies. All this leads to crisis of five-year age.
To understand that the kid needs the help about several signs are possible:
- whims without the reasons and a hysterics at the slightest pretext, disobedience;
- sharp change of behavior, aggression;
- imitation adults, aping;
- everything to do desire most without adults;
- the aspiration to give the imaginations for the truth;
- nervousness, hyperactivity is replaced by fatigue;
- emergence of various fears, isolation;
- roughness in communication with peers and seniors;
- everything to do aspiration to spite;
- constant discontent;
- obstinacy, desire to impose the will.
It is impossible to tell precisely what amount of time will take the hard period. For each kid it is individual. Crisis can last from several weeks to one year. And problem time not precisely in 5 years, and later or earlier begins. It is also individual.
How to help the kid of the house
First of all it is important not to give in to panic. Therefore is sense to realize that such crisis – a problem inevitable. Parents can make it less painful. Even in such period there are pluses. The hidden talents of children begin to be shown. Parents will be able to choose for the child and themselves hobby.
The developing sections, occupations will help to realize the potential of the kid. It is very good to ask the child that for him the most fascinating. It is possible to offer something in addition to the offspring's wishes. There is no sense to be put on that at such age children will find the world glory, but in search of calling by it it will be simpler subsequently. New acquaintances and aspiration to achieve success will not leave time for experiences. And the hobby will facilitate the course of crisis, will teach to achieve goals.
From parents the maximum of patience and a favorable situation, caress and care is required. Reciprocal irritation and anger as reaction to hysterics, are inadmissible. It will aggravate a situation. It is not necessary to react to whims: it is recommended to behave quietly. In the absence of special attention the splashes in emotions will soon stop, without having become the norm. It is necessary to find out the reason of discontent of the baby after end of a hysterics.
Care and attention are obligatory. It is important to keep trusting relationship, to play, walk together. It is impossible to interfere with aspiration of the kid to independence. It is necessary that on the experience children understood that for them there are meanwhile too difficult things and the help is necessary for the performance conceived. But both parties will be pleased by the executed simple assignment.
It is not necessary to criticize the kid often. Positive assessment is necessary for him. It is worth excluding categoriality. Instead of pressure it is necessary to explain intelligibly to the baby in the form of a conversation what cannot be done. It is necessary to talk at the same time as equals. It proves friendly attitude of the adult and causes trust.
Councils of psychologists
If the help to the kid is not required then and to offer it there is no sense. If parents noticed what to kids copes, it is not necessary to discharge it of performance. It is much better to suggest to do together.
- Physical punishments can incite against parents. In this case the child takes offense on all people around, grows at cruel.
- There is no sense to be frightened and flight of children's imagination. It is better for history to compose together. Perhaps, in the future fascinating occupation will develop into a profession.
- The positive relation is deserved by all ideas of the baby. It is desirable to be interested in his dreams. There is no sense to forget about development and to parents. Personal growth will allow to make crisis time imperceptible.
It is very good to note merits of the kid and to help it to try to obtain new progress. Obligatory in a conversation to explain to the child what is bad that is good. Special attention this aspect deserves at tendency of the baby to aggression, fights.
But there is a sense to begin to think of training logically, to object without aggression, to formulate the arguments. It will help to adjust further communication with people around without hysterics.
It is important that the child did not miss. In this case he will have no reasons for isolation and irritability: useful business will not allow to be delayed to negative thoughts in the head.
Mistakes
In time, hard for all, to punish and abuse the baby – a big mistake. Persistent and soft communication is promoted by the recommendations of psychologists:
- It is important to keep trust of the kid, having become it the friend and an example. Then the difficult period will become much simpler.
- It is impossible to ignore the child, going about only the own business.
- Unacceptably causeless increase in a voice, humiliation and power influence.
- It is important to do without notations and lectures, decrees on superiority of adults.
- It is impossible to ignore inadequate behavior and obvious aggression. There is no sense to postpone the help if the kid needs it.
It is very good to have fun with children, to play with them, to understand their world. It is important that the child realized that the major for parents – not career, but his wellbeing.
Crisis of five years – serious test for nerves of adults. It is not necessary to give in to pity and to seek for establishment of rest in the house by force. Only tranquility and friendliness will help to keep a positive spirit even at the most unpredictable behavior of the child.