The jealousy in the relations, is similar to spices in a dish — introduces special taste. But, as well as spice when there is too much it, can spoil the most tasty dish, and the excessive jealousy can destroy the strongest relations. About what is jealousy in what and when it is useful and as this feeling to cause in the guy will go the speech in the offered material.
In what situations the jealousy is useful?
In the beginning it is necessary to deal with what is jealousy and what its signs. In spite of the fact that this feeling is the constant satellite of mankind throughout all its history, still there is no consensus, about what is jealousy. The psychology developed a set of definitions to this feeling, but any of them is not capable to express all essence of what the jealous or jealous person should test.
Most of psychologists agree in opinion that the essence of jealousy consists in the bright emotional feeling of a sobstvennichestvo which aggravated under the influence of various circumstances, strengthened by egoism and desire entirely to dispose of other person and usually expressed in distrustfulness and suspiciousness.
Whether you know? The word "jealousy" is mentioned in the Bible 28 times.
The men's jealousy results from natural aspiration to dominion, submission and a victory. Proceeding from it, the jealousy at the man arises at the time of feeling of possible loss, loss of control and the power.
Emotionally the jealousy consists from:
- fear (to lose something significant, to appear alone, to lose);
- rage, anger (on or the partner, on the probable rival);
- offenses (on or the partner);
- pity to;
- alarms.
The most widespread signs of men's jealousy are:
- groundless charges;
- aspiration to complete control;
- scandals and scenes or, on the contrary, full "withdrawal" and restriction of communication and any contacts.
The jealousy is inherent in all people, it is genetically caused, difference only in its individual "quantity" and types of manifestation. The psychology classifies 2 types of jealousy:
- Pathological — shown in the chronic paranoid crazy psychosis developing as a result of influence of negative internal and external motivators of the jealous man.
- Normal — characterized by feeling of doubt in the partner and arising at an established fact of treason or at suspicion of treason which is caused by behavior of the partner.
Normal, reasonably, adequate jealousy is not capable to do much harm to partners and even, on the contrary, can strengthen their relations.
Whether you know? According to statistical data about 20% of crimes are committed because of jealousy.
Therefore it is useful to cause sometimes in the man jealousy:
- In case it "walks". Often the men's adultery is the result of confidence of the man in the impunity, something type — "everything will forgive and it will not get to anywhere". However, such point of view quickly changes if there is a threat that the woman will make the same.
- For revival of the dying-away feelings. At the long relations at men often there occurs cooling to the woman, her perception as the read book. Provoking of feeling of jealousy in this case can cause fear to lose the half and, thereby, to introduce a vivifying spark in the relations in the man.
- For awakening of interest. Very developed instinct of rivalry and a victory is inherent in the stronger sex and it often works at the sight of the woman surrounded with admirers, and the jealousy which arose in subconsciousness is capable to cause passion.
- In order that "to return the man". Having seen that the woman, is interesting, and it is even expensive to others, the man can feel jealousy which will force it to overestimate the act.
As it is possible to force the guy to be jealous and afraid to lose
In this section the speech how to kindle normal jealousy when the guy and the girl do not see each other — through social networks, in correspondence or by phone and also directly in life will go.
VKontakte and on correspondence
Modern communication technologies and, in particular, the created thanks to them, social networks give the mass of opportunities to cause jealous feelings in the partner.
Important! To the woman who decided to cause for advantage in the man jealousy, the main thing is not to allow physical treason. It very seldom says goodbye.
Only several simple methods, and "object" will snare jealous torments:
- To sustain a pause before responding to its message. The pause several minutes, and even the whole hour, undoubtedly, will raise a question of why so long did not answer. Easy, playful and not too truthful justification will trigger curiosity in the girl at the guy.
- "Abyss" on two-three of days, and then in excellent mood to return to social network, responding to its messages with the benevolence which is slightly seasoned with humour.
- "To be mistaken" occasionally when sending the message. The harmless message "accidental" sent to "object", but addressed to other man, and the unostentatious apologies which followed it surely will wake in it the jealous man.
- They periodically should be updated, with a binding to feelings, but also without excessive gravity. Let "object" puzzle who caused the thoughts expressed by the status — him or someone by another.
- It is a strong irritant for jealousy. Unostentatiously placed pictures in which the girl is surrounded by girlfriends and friends conducting active life will attract interest of the guy interesting her.
In life
Life gives many opportunities for arousing normal jealousy at the partner:
- Appearance of the girl. It is impossible to overestimate value of its change. Due care for skin of face and body, a new hairstyle or a new thing, new image by all means will cause a thought in the guy that his girlfriend fell in love or tries to be pleasant to someone. However, having changed image, it is necessary to keep it throughout long time, otherwise — due result it will not bring.
- Thin and harmless flirtation. The most effective way. The light coquetry with other men in the presence of "" will raise the mass of questions subsequently, about the one who it was that it was, etc.
- Refusal of a meeting. The reason for an explanation — any, from feeling sick before the help to mother. The cancelled appointment surely by all means will excite at it strong desire of the next meeting.
- Praise of an act, achievement or hobby of the mutual friend, expression to it sympathies or admiration of its progress. Others success in itself is capable to cause in the guy feeling of envy, and here also the delight of the girl is a rattling mix of jealousy. And the more the delight — the is more intensity of emotions.
- Joy of arrival of other man. At once it is necessary to stipulate that this reception will fully work only when joyful emotions and sharp improvement from arrival of other man are shown only in the presence of "the" guy.
- Protection of other man. Protection of the mutual friend when in the conversation about its mistakes and failures begun by the partner, dialogue about it, or even the dispute, undoubtedly, causes in the partner of a thought of the reasons of such protection, about possible unindifference from "half" to this person, and from such thoughts to jealousy — a half-step.
- Visits of cafe of one or with girlfriends. And, if the partner wants to join — without explanation sharply to refuse. Second or third such "campaign" guarantees the suspicions turning into reproaches and the subsequent to it jealousy.
- Stories about "former" or "former". It is not obligatory to praise at all, there will be enough just stories about where together were about what talked, etc. The number of such stories will turn into quality — to it will bother to listen a story about "former" ("former"), the jealousy expressed, at least, in discontent from a talk about other men, but not about him will blaze.
- The ban to pick up "mobile phone". Creation around the mobile phone of a certain aura of mystery, the ban to touch it, at the same time — SMS correspondence with someone — all this combined cannot but cause a privacy at calls the suspicions passing into jealousy.
- Change of habits and addictions. Such way is recommended if there is a purpose only a little to hype up jealous feelings.
It is important! If the man already showed the not indifference to a situation — the woman should stop immediately manipulations with jealousy.
At distance
The distance is dangerous to the relations, it can destroy them. Therefore, when provoking jealousy in such cases the maximum care and accuracy is necessary. It is possible to try such ways:
- Not to call most several times per day. One call and one SMS will be enough.
- To sustain a pause before answering its phone call. Answering a question why long did not answer — to avoid specifics and objectivity.
- At a conversation casually to mention that changed the appearance, to suggest to play in "guess" and then to send a photo of the new style — let now thinks why it is made and for whom.
- In the next phone call to tell of visit of bar or night club and to drop accidentally about the new acquaintance.
Receptions which will force the man to be jealous
This section is entirely devoted to female cunnings thanks to which the girl can "encourage" the partner jealousy and force to look at it absolutely with other eyes.
Learn how to attract love of the man in the life.
Sexuality
"The man is visual" — and this feature it is necessary to use for all 100%. The Ukhozhennost and refinement are the best way to win attention of the man. And if to add a little sexuality to this image — for example, the clothes opened in a zone of a decollete, legs or a stomach — at least, the silent jealousy is provided. Especially, if in such look the woman goes without "half" on shops or to cafe.
Ignoring of the partner
The men's nature such is that does not accept ignoring and lack of attention, it can be used by means of the following receptions:
- To maintain a pause before answering a call — to follow "the rule of five beeps".
- Not to show the excessive joy of its call, the not to show more impatient expectation.
- Not to answer occasionally a call. On surely subsequent question, what is it was and in what business — is plausible and, the most important, adequately to explain the absence reason. And any initiative — let will suffer guesses and itself will ask, to explain the reason of employment or absence — only answering his question.
- Not to ask again several times about the planned meeting at all.
- To exclude infinite questions of its feelings and thoughts — the woman herself will show these the interest, and, naturally here not to jealousy any more.
It will be interesting to you to learn how the man in love behaves.
Meetings with friends
In such situations the woman always is the winner. In the company where most of women, remarks and jokes of her partner to very few people from the talking ladies will be interesting, they will discord with the general female topic of conversation and, is free or involuntarily, but the man should devote all attention to the half. In the company, mostly, men's, the woman is a bigger winner: the noncommittal coquetry, a game, an active conversation undoubtedly will inflame jealous feelings at the man.
How to force to be jealous the ex-boyfriend
With "former" it is more difficult, but, at the same time more simply — its "weak points" are known to you and it is possible to work more safely.
- It is impossible to show "former" at all (even inadvertently) sufferings and experiences from parting. On the contrary — it is necessary to show indifference to it. And it can "scratch" his vanity, and here and to jealousy nearby.
- Kisses with the new partner. Pathos and passionate kiss on the lips in front of "former", bright, such which with it was not; courageous touches of the new partner — often it strongly touches "jealousy strings" at "former".
- Open flirtation. Laughter, flirting, permission to other men of to embrace and other female "features" able to excite the man, and, especially, to force to attract attention "former". He will pay attention that playful "former" with it was not such, he will look for the reasons in himself and, perhaps, it will have a desire everything to develop and to begin anew.
- Smart look. The main thing — it has to be other than when were together and "former" has to see it. Another better. The orders drawing attention of men underlining advantages and hiding shortcomings, the adding charm and chic to a silhouette a successful make-up — a word, all that heart of other men will force to tremble.
We recommend to you to learn how to hold near ourselves the man.
Possible mistakes which can spoil everything
Provoking of jealousy — business thin and accurate, can lead a careless step or action to absolutely opposite, from expected, to consequences.
The typical mistakes which are finally destroying the relations look as follows:
- Excessive flirtation, demonstration of interest in other man to the mutual friend, especially to the friend of the guy. It is necessary to show to the partner only the interest of other men in itself, but not own to them.
- Refusal in intim. Too long abstention can push the partner to satisfaction "on the party". The intimate proximity can be reduced, but is not stopped in any way.
- Recognition in treason (even invented). After that restoration of the relations is extremely problematic. No similar "revelations" should be.
- Meetings with "former". Sometimes it is done as peculiar "lesson" for the partner. Such "occupations" should be excluded is not school and there is a danger that the partner will learn "lesson" too literally and the irrevocable past will destroy the fragile present.
- Provoking of constant jealousy. Continuous doubts and jealousy will only exhaust nervous system of the man, and there already not to the touching relations at all. The jealousy has to be not permanent, but periodic — today to unnerve him, and tomorrow — to turn into the good girl.
Read also how to make that the man ran for you.
The jealousy — the most powerful female tool by means of which it is possible to recover, would seem, the hopeless relations. But it and the dangerous tool — any blurt or action is capable to ruin irrevocably that long time was built and saved.