Any scientist or the psychologist will not give the concrete answer to a question why men and women change each other. The reasons at all are individual.
But in one experts are uniform — roots need to be looked for or in the far childhood, or in failures of adulthood because of what there are psychological complexes which push people on this act. Considering that the psychology of men significantly differs from psychology of women, motives for unfaithfulness at them different too.
Why men change
In all ages of women interested why men change that is not enough for them and as to forgive them after deeds. For an explanation of this fact it is necessary to find the reasons for which there is a treachery. There are several main motives of the men's unfaithfulness systematized by scientists.
Important! One of the main problems of the vast majority of marriages — a discrepancy of desires and needs of spouses.
Sexual dissatisfaction
Indifference of the woman to sex is the serious reason of men's treason. If the partner constantly hears refusal of the darling under different pretexts, then, naturally, that long he will not suffer it and will find a consolation on the party.
Competitive spirit and self-affirmation
These are cases when men perceive women only as a trophy or a prize by means of which they ego-trip. Generally this reason concerns representatives of middle age with unrealized professional ambitions. The failures in the household and career sphere compensate for the account of sexual victories. It is important to them to realize that they still rather attractive and in "full combat readiness".
Dissatisfaction of values
Still treason can be a consequence of the psychological trauma got in the childhood or the violated social norms of a monogamy because of what complexes were created. Changing, the man thereby ego-trips, receives superiority over the partner.
Shortage of energy
The emotional burning out, fatigue from each other arising as a result couple does not see further the joint future can be the main cause of such treason. But there are factors holding them together, for example, children. And all attempts directed to preservation of the relations do not yield positive results. Then there is desire to bring pain to other half as the sign of a protest and as an occasion to leave.
Boredom
Not the last place among the reasons for which the man changes the woman is considered boredom. It arises because in the relations, especially in sexual, there are no changes. All same from year to year. And somehow to diversify the intimate life, the man finds to himself the mistress with whom he can turn into reality even the most impracticable imaginations.
Whether you know? Because recently women became more independent in the financial plan, the number of their unfaithfulness strongly increased.
Why women change
Women change much less than men. They decide on this act longer, considering all pros and cons. If the man considers himself the hunter and goes towards the aim, without thinking of consequences, then the woman most often on treason is pushed by very good reason.
Emotional emptiness
One of such reasons is emptiness in the emotional sphere. It arises owing to influence of the boring monotonous life deprived of paints, novelty, new impressions. And as women are beings more emotional, than their soulmates, the lack of a variety of feelings forces out in embraces of the one who will present these emotions.
Shortage of intimate proximity
Over time intimate life of partners becomes monotonous, less bright and sensual. The attraction weakens, the man more often complains of fatigue, problems with health, potency, etc. The woman or never tests more and more seldom an orgasm in a bed, but constantly imitates it. To admit it to the elect there is not enough force and courage. There is only an option is a treason.
Thirst of revenge
The offense at the partner becomes the main reason of treason because of revenge. Generally it occurs as the response to treachery of the man that that felt the same pain and humiliation, as its second half. It is almost impossible to restore trust after such acts.
Important! The emotional dissatisfaction in the relations and desire to get emotional connection on the party is the main reason of treason.
Lack of communication
Not for nothing say about women that those are auditory. After a long time of stay together partners communicate among themselves more and more seldom. And most often it occurs from the man. The woman feels lonely, unloved and to nobody necessary. And as the result begins to seek elsewhere the lover who can become for her a soulmate, the comforter, the gentle romantic, the noble hero without any shortcomings.
Low self-assessment
The biggest enemy of romanticism is the daily occurrence or life which sucks in women an everyday routine and lowers its self-assessment. Plus the inattention or negligence and continuous reproaches from the husband can be added to it. And not to go crazy from such life, it looks for attention from absolutely other man, beginning all with the little flirtation and flirting later turning into intimate proximity.
Whether it is possible and whether it is necessary to forgive treason of darling
Treason is, first of all, a treachery. It involves big destructions, the broken destinies, the broken hearts, loss of trust, etc. But if the man and the woman still had feelings to each other and they want to be together, value the proximity, then, having endured a similar situation, couple can reach the new level of the relations, forgive, forget and go further together to all barriers to spite.
Whether you know? Experts claim that the sudden death during sex at men occurs more often because he has illegitimate sex in an unfamiliar situation, but not with the spouse at home.
Pluses
As it is not paradoxical, but pardon of changing can bring positive result, namely:
- after forgiveness at couple the new "honeymoon" sated with emotions, sensuality, passion, love and romanticism can begin;
- partners will begin to change the interests, hobbies, values, a way of life to be together and that more treason did not repeat;
- the relations can become much stronger and stronger, than were before treachery because lovers will be afraid to lose each other already once and for all.
Minuses
But, except good, there is also a reverse side which consists in the following:
- having changed once, the person can change still;
- if couple has children, then they will suffer most strongly and will blame themselves that parents have problems in the relations;
- the partner to whom changed will cease to trust the half even after forgiveness and at any opportunity will reproach to it with the made offense;
- changing does not regret deeds.
Family life after treason
Couples which endured treason differently get out of current situation.
Psychologists conditionally divided them into several groups:
- spouses treat the first group, some could not stay together after treachery and dispersed;
- the partners who decided to keep the union, but still nothing changing in the relations and not lifted to new level belong to the second group;
- the third group begins life together in a new way, having forgotten all old, every day strengthening the relations more and more.
Read in more detail about the reasons and consequences of treason.
Of course, it is not so easy to endure treachery of darling and simply as it seems at first sight. But the most important — it is not necessary to burn bridges at once and to break off the relations. At least, it is necessary to allow itself to consider and solve all the time as far as in general they are important and as it will affect the subsequent life. And only after that it is possible to make very important decisions concerning time of very many people including own children.