Virtual communication rushed into our life, having become the most popular way of exchange of information. It strongly and everywhere took positions, allowing to strike up with ease new acquaintances at distance. Our article will give advice how to organize correspondence, to interest and carry away the interlocutor and also how to avoid mistakes and troubles.
Correspondence psychology
The epistolary genre, apparently, was a thing of the past — the modern rhythm of life does not leave time for long written messages on paper, it is far simpler to carry out a call by phone. But emergence of the Internet gave to this genre new life, having changed form and content.
There were new ways of communication — phone calls, correspondence by e-mail, mailing of the SMS, and an opportunity to communicate on various social networks among which there is VKontakte, Schoolmates, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, by means of the computer or phone. And if the computer is not always available, then everyone has phone in a pocket.
At such ways of communication to the forefront there are following qualities:
- ability to write interesting and competent messages;
- ability to interest the participant of correspondence:
- it is correct to respond to messages of the partner;
- ability to understand and estimate the thoughts hidden in response messages.
Whether you know? The book Voltaire's Heart (2005, the author Nyeves) is the first novel on the basis of only electronic correspondence that does a plot to more dynamic.
It is correct to organize and to correspond skillfully such advice will help:
- Use valid style of communication, it should not be dry. Avoid whenever possible a slang and obscene expressions — the unruliness in communication will not give to the girl of a charm.
- Try to illustrate in the message of an event of the life with photos that the participant of correspondence got used to your shape.
- Do not postpone the reply to the message for a long time that the interlocutor did not think that you forgot about it, and did not switch the attention to others. Ask questions about its messages — it speaks about your interest.
- Try to ask interesting questions not only of leisure and work, but also of his outlooks on life, of opinion on any given questions. It will allow it to flash intelligence. Asking interesting questions, you can receive interesting answers.
- Write what qualities in it are pleasant to you, you praise its positive lines — guys like to read about themselves. It promotes strengthening of the relations.
- At the beginning of correspondence do not overload already short messages with smilies. Most often they are used by those who do not manage to formulate thoughts.
As well as what it is possible to write to the guy to VK or to SMS to interest him
Communication by means of SMS and letters in social networks creates extensive opportunities to intrigue and interest in itself any guy. The girl needs to seize this powerful weapon and it is correct to use it:
- create own contradictory image by means of SMS or VKontakte — you are frank, but are mysterious, mild, but are dangerous, cheerful, but are a little sad;
- show an initiative and be not afraid to write the first, but at the same time strike up a conversation kind of accidentally. Use the obtained information from a subscription of your interlocutor to communities and groups: I too here traveled …, How to get the ticket for soccer?, I have records of this group …;
- use humour and playful comments that will allow to bypass acute angles in communication. For example: Came running for work, grabbed a shovel — I row money, I can make eyes — I will not miss, Turn back, I see you, Why to you in games, you have monsters I;
- be not persuasive — stop for a while communication if pauses dragged on, there was a chill and phrases of steel are similar to formal replies. If it does not pass, then, most likely, it is not your option — better not to spend time in vain;
- do not write about boredom and do not force you to entertain — To me boringly, Tell something. If such mood came, it is better to postpone correspondence or to try to adjust itself on a positive;
- prove to be as the many-sided personality — be unusual. Today you joke and laugh — I like one boy — and this boy you, will send sad verses tomorrow, in other day will touch his jealousy — Do not worry, me is to a lump to console, and then you will write what it is wonderful. It is not necessary to miss with you in that case, and feelings constantly will be in a tone;
- if you left the guy, and he passed into the category of being, try not to write romantic and hackneyed phrases, be indifferent and ironic in messages even if on heart cats scrape.
Having mastered and having applied these rules, you start thoughts which will give to an object the chance to think of you, to analyze and not to forget.
Important! Do not dramatize a situation, do not try to cause pity: humour, indifference and restraint — three best ways to touch the guy.
How to interest the unfamiliar man?
In the nature of men the desire to win the girl is put therefore it is possible to interest the stranger, having provided it a role of the conqueror and researcher. It needs to be intrigued and involved in execution of this role. To call the stranger unfamiliar it will not turn out, you are going to give up him correspondence, so you have some data:
- If you accidentally learned its phone, then playful wrong SMS can be the cause of acquaintance — Let's meet on Wednesday, on Tuesday I cannot or My project is ready, it is possible to discuss. Such phrases will cause bewilderment, examination and, perhaps, acquaintance continuation will follow.
- If you saw each other in the company, then it is possible to remind of himself and interesting incident at the You Remember the Overturned Vase, I Was Near party.
- If you found the page of the pleasant man in the Internet, try to get in friends, you praise its photo and a statement, try to interest in yourself and the intelligence. Invite to the page for communication continuation.
- If you happened and other case can not be, try to leave the phone or the business card with a request for further correspondence.
- You watch style of the letter and create an image of the cheerful, sociable, attentive interlocutor who will manage to listen, give advice, will allow the man to show an initiative.
Important! You learn to keep up any conversation, to get out of a difficult life situation, put heart and soul in the messages.
Signs that the guy is interested by you
Minus of correspondence is in what is impossible on intonation, to appearance, gestures and emotions to understand feelings of the person and it is necessary to lean only on words and phrases. After all efforts and works there is a wish to learn also about results — whether the guy is interested or even he is in love.
It is possible to draw conclusions on the basis of his answers and messages:
- the guy is cheerful and easily responds to jokes and humour, cheerful smilies began a thicket to appear in its messages, it is a lot of pleasant words in which care and attention is taken;
- the photo and voice messages come. It means, communication moved to other, more contact level, he wants to brag of himself and to report new data;
- having gained trust, you get new more information what was not in networks earlier about his life;
- the guy often is on your page, comments, sends likes and paid gifts through VKontakte;
- does not stint compliments, openly writes that you are pleasant to it and he values acquaintance, begins to insist on a personal meeting.
Important! Never report data of the cash card, the account and the passport, do not send money to the stranger.
If at least several points find reflection in your correspondence, so the plan for a zainteresovyvaniye of this guy was successful.
Councils what cannot be written the man
Entering into the relations in networks, it is necessary to remember well what taboos for correspondence exist. What it is better not to write about:
- do not send the photos topless — where after that there will be such photo, it is not known, and you will pass thoughtless and available;
- do not concern intimate subjects at the beginning of acquaintance;
- do not send long messages, without telling about everything at once to keep an intrigue;
- the bad mood is better to hide and postpone the answer until the best times — moaning and regrets about the past will not find a response from the interlocutor;
- you monitor the speech and creation of phrases, find golden mean between inarticulate speech and a household slang;
- avoid filler words — types, well;
- the roughness and insults are not admissible.
To be protected from speculators on the websites, be attentive and show healthy suspiciousness, striking up acquaintances, Try to find out as much as possible information on the person. Analyze messages: as a rule, letters from swindlers are crowded with compliments, declarations of love and diminutive-hypocoristic addresses.
It will be interesting to you to learn how to interest the man on the first appointment and in the relations.
The submitted recommendations are indicative only. All correct words and phrases have to proceed from sincere motives. Intuitively the intelligence, erudition will help to choose the correct course of acquaintance and it is a little knowledge of psychology.