People often do not reach what was would like, because of diffidence. This quality is put since the childhood. Today for parents there is a set of councils how to bring up the child that he became self-assured and had a good self-assessment. We suggest you to study recommendations how to get rid of an inferiority complex to adult men and women and how to help the loved one if such problem exists at it.
If the person lives life with a thought that he is defective, is not suitable for anything, and other people are more successful and it is better than him, then psychologists attribute him an inferiority complex. As well as other complexes, it affects health, behavior and quality of human life. Such people consider the life not important, and themselves pettiness, defective. Studying this complex from the scientific point of view was carried out by the Austrian psychologist and the psychiatrist Alfred Adler (1870-1937).
He became the founder of the concept of individual psychology and in details described symptoms and the reasons of an inferiority complex. It is worth paying attention that this complex cannot be considered only negative line of the person. Depending on circumstances and other qualities of the person suffering from it it can also become an incentive to action, the reason of active self-improvement, development of zeal on overcoming difficulties on a course of life. In that case the diffidence is just overcome by own efforts.
Learn how to meditate for recuperation.
However if independently it does not work well, nevertheless the help of the expert who will help to get rid of feeling of lameness is necessary and to help with achievement of the desirable purposes and advances on a scale of ranks in society. Thoughts of the negligibility lead to a depression, is frequent also to imposing on itself hands. The person with not worked inferiority complex will hardly manage to construct the safe family relations, to find reliable friends and to be held in respect in working collective.
Whether you know? In world history there is a set of examples when people became famous and achieved the stunning achievements in some sphere though they at the same time had physical defects and complexes. Among them — a life story of Demosfen, Albert Einstein, Merlyn Monro, Mark Zuckerberg, Jim Carrey and many others. Even types of an inferiority complex — for example, a complex of Napoleon experiencing sufferings because of the small growth are called by the names of such people.
Inferiority complex symptoms are well registered in literature on psychology.
Get rid of constant fear, a stress and shyness.
- he is dissatisfied all the time with himself, the appearance, behavior, acts, work, creation products;
- it is too self-critical;
- in a conversation he belittles itself(himself) and the advantages, compares itself(himself) to others, looks back at public opinion;
- too worries because of failure or public censure.
Such person usually is afraid of communication with other people, in the company is more silent, has few friends. The diffident person can constantly pretend to be the victim, loves when feel sorry for him. At men the uncertainty and feeling of own negligibility can be shown by aggressive behavior, frequent consumption of alcoholic beverages, an environment of status symbols — expensive cars, things, the real estate. Such person can also compensate the complexes and the underestimated self-assessment by haughty behavior in relation to others, frequent boasting.
The first and main reason for development in the person of an inferiority complex — mistakes in his education in the childhood. Among them:
- excessive guardianship by parents;
- deficiency of attention of parents;
- constant criticism and comparison of the child with other peers, statement someone as an example and, as a result, offense of feelings of own fumes and derogation of its achievements;
- the physical defects including which are observed in certain age, for example, too small growth, chubby forms, poor eyesight and glasses wearing, etc.
At the person the low self-assessment owing to frequent failures, bad luck, an adverse situation in collective and family can also develop. Happens that there is a development of a habit to depreciate everything that is available.
Whether you know? How the person perceives the world surrounding him — with optimism or pessimism — is put in it by the genetic program and depends on level in an organism of neuropeptids of Y. If their concentration is insufficient, then the person perceives everything in gray tones and is pessimistic.
Having in details considered the reasons and symptoms of an inferiority complex, we turn to the main and important question — as to get rid of it. Let's at once note that long and hard work over itself will be required. Parents should reconsider approaches to education of the child not to provoke development of violations in it in assessment of own advantage.
We strengthen nervous system and a brain vitamins.
For a start it is necessary to deal with the reasons of existence of a complex. If he is from the childhood, then, most likely, the help of the specialist in study of the reasons, forgiveness and an otpuskaniye of a situation will be required. Independently you can remember those incidents when felt especially badly, for example, at persecution with participation of schoolmates, constant criticism of the teacher, the overestimated expectations of parents, etc. Try to live those emotions, experiences which tested in these situations. And then make attempt to look at a situation with already adult eyes, soberly estimate the and behavior of your offender.
Important! The diagnosis inferiority complex is made on the basis of a conversation with the psychologist and passing of special psychological tests.
- Take the sheet of paper, divide it into two columns. In left — make the list of the negative beliefs about yourself, and in right enter positive beliefs, using a turn but. For example, I studied as some three because I have no good mental capacities. So adults — teachers, parents, etc. spoke. Opposite to such statement it is possible to write the current situation of affairs: But I do favorite thing and I have fine relations with fellow workers. After drawing up complete lists the left honor should be torn off and thrown out, and it is even better to burn, and to re-read the right list daily.
- After you established the reasons of negative assessment of, it is necessary to pass to very important and labor-consuming stage — redirection of own thoughts from negative into a positive side. It will demand the constant tension and work. However without this stage not to cope with a complex.
- Make the list strong and weaknesses. If it is difficult for you to make it independently, ask to help dear people. Weaknesses can try to be corrected, for example, to lose weight, play sports, to go to beauty shop, etc. If it cannot do, then it is necessary to reconcile as there is no person in the world at which they would not be present. But every time when you think of them, force themselves to remember the strengths. On production of a habit to think of itself some time will well leave, however together with it there will be also an increase in a self-assessment.
- Learn to perceive criticism correctly, carrying it not to own personality, and to your acts. Think why others can criticize you. Perhaps, the criticism is not constructive.
- Reconsider the circle of contacts. In your close circle there have to be only positive, purposeful people, optimists. Such you will be inspired on positive changes in yourself.
- You learn to communicate if you uncomfortablly feel in the company of people. Perhaps, similar will be required to attend courses of oratorical skill or something.
- Constantly increase the intellectual level by reading, self-training. It will allow you to expand your knowledge, skills, so, will increase number of your strengths. For reading include the books describing successful people, awakening love for life, motivation for actions, etc. in literature number.
- If you have ideals, idols, then you will need to leave them. Your life will not be and should not resemble on any another.
- Force themselves to rejoice and derive pleasure from what you have and it is given you daily. Soon it will become at you a habit. For a start it is possible to create the diary in which daily to note positive situations.
Whether you know? Scientists investigated through what time any given actions pass into a usual thing. As a result they came to a conclusion that on average the habit is formed within 66 days.
If after implementation of all above-mentioned steps your self-assessment does not raise and the inferiority complex will prevent you to derive still pleasure from life and to go forward, you will need to ask for the help the psychologist.
So, we already found out that self-confidence is put in the childhood. The huge role in it is played by parents, especially mothers. Below we chose for you the list of councils for how not to allow development in the child of an inferiority complex:
- Do not impose the overestimated requirements to your child or do not demand from it achievement of those purposes which you did not reach, the expected behavior. You remember, it has the life, and he is free to do what is necessary for it, but not you.
- Do not emphasize with words and actions that it depends on you.
- Refuse authoritativeness in education. It has to be based on trust, friendship, love and mutual understanding. The model of carrot and stick also is unacceptable.
- Do not compare it to other children.
- If you resort to criticism, then criticize not the child, and his acts.
- Be not too strict and do not impose whole bunch of the bans.
- Do not limit freedom of action of the child.
- Perceive the child seriously.
- Participate in his life, be interested and live together with it feelings. Support at the moments udach and defeats.
- You praise the kid more often and point out his strengths.
- If the reason of a low self-assessment of the child — school collective, teaching staff, then transfer it to other educational institution.
- Help the child to make personal growth, sending him to circles, sports sections, on a language course, musical occupations, opening thus in him talents and disclosing new strengths.
If grains of an inferiority complex are already seeded, then the address to the expert in children's psychology will be required.
Important! Psychologists advise at observation at the child of an inferiority complex, first of all, to pay attention to themselves. The diffident parent will not be able to grow up the confident, purposeful person. Therefore work on itself originally will be required to bring up the child on own positive example.
If you paid attention that the person dear to you suffers from an inferiority complex, then from you some efforts will be required. It is necessary to begin with establishment of the reason of a complex. Without having dealt with it, it will not be possible to help the person. Then the daily work including the proofs in a verbal or behavioural form confirming the value of this person for you and also his belief available of strengths will be required. At the same time you should not undertake the solution of problems of the person, for example.
Read also about what is a psikhomatika, illusion and subconsciousness.
He should solve them. Your role is a support, recognition and the help and also motivation on achievement of the goals. The last needs to be done by hints on the fact that the person has enough forces and abilities to reach the desirable and also statements concerning faith in him. It will also need to be praised more often. And here with criticism it is necessary to be careful. It is only necessary to criticize in fact and very softly. Help to disclose close its strengths and prompt where and as it can use them to have satisfaction from own activity. If you cannot overpersuade close in its necessity and value, ask for the help the expert. In conclusion we will note that it is seldom possible to meet the person who is absolutely deprived of complexes. It is important how he manages with them to cope and as far as they interfere with him qualitatively to live.
It will be interesting to you to learn - what diseases can cure embraces.
It is possible to learn about existence of an inferiority complex, having passed psychological test which the set is presented to Networks. Consultation at the psychologist will help to reveal it also. If the underestimated self-assessment prevents you to live comfortably, gets in the way of achievement of the goals, then it is necessary to begin work on itself or to ask for the help the expert. Today the set of techniques which allow to help the person even with very started cases is developed.
Inferiority complex. It is the defect in consciousness received as a result of the wrong education. Did not interest parents that they the punishments generate sensation of fear. Sensation of fear for aloud the introduced ideas, for actions, for desire to be successful and in general for any self-expression. Cause sympathies in me people who without being afraid of condemnation of crowd speak not that they morally, and speak as they think, and act also. Let them call shit, but for that they are not pants, and the bravery, as we know, takes the cities.
Hallucination
https://schiza.net/viewtopic.php? p=102283&sid=9fd4708646beaf4b0fb1989ff03b4e78#p102283
list, please 1) all the advantages (do not hesitate, spread what in you beautiful what you are able to do, you do best of all?) 2) shortcomings, remediable, and of what it will be difficult to get rid.
Sleepyhead
http://www.woman.ru/psycho/personality/thread/3929793/1/#m20826296
A year ago the dancer self-educated person was engaged in the Techtonic dance, during dance I find big self-confidence. I can draw easily to myself attention of crowd, but only in the company at least with one friend... I draw attention simply: I get up, I turn on the music and I begin to dance, at this moment I have not complex at all, just I dance, but being one in crowd of people I will hesitate on such dance... On a City Day with friends danced, looked 5 hundred at me to the people, at institute gave concerts on the stage, but all only in the company... remaining one I become constraining again... Read a subject about the 22-year zadrot, learned in it a little himself, but I was lucky, I am much younger than it, I still have time to be rehabilitated. Tomorrow examination in descriptive geometry, I will finish preparation and I will begin to conduct a notebook with achievements and I will be engaged in the delirium generator. From a thought of the progress and achievements the mood, thanks for councils is very much lightened, I will set as the purpose: To learn to be sure, being left one, without the company of friends.
Epoc
https://www.pickupforum.ru/index.php? showtopic=138801&p=2378115