The image of the self-confident and resolute macho which you are in the imagination so corresponds a little to what leaves in practice, when it comes to an opposite sex. Whether you thought why alone with ourselves we are sure, resolute, eloquent, in other words - winners? And having opened a mouth in the presence of the smallest handful of people, we feel like full losers?
All salt in shyness, complexes, children's offenses, former failures, the underestimated self-assessment. Actually, it is not so terrible that you are constraining, the fact that this quality prevents you to prove to be the present, your advantages and vice versa, shows you to people around not in the best light is much worse. So, now we will learn how to struggle with shyness, and how it is correct to present and show the merits to the world.
Be that whom you are
Many men consider that women love impudent and rough. The element of truth in it is, however if you not impudent and not rough, everything what you will achieve, trying to seem to such is a fast disappointment of the ladylove, in the personal relations it is necessary to unmask. In other words, you should understand how to overcome shyness and not at the same time not to be inclined to pretense.
For this purpose be realistic (kind of it was difficult) about all the merits:
- In what areas can you show atypical, above average knowledge in what you the expert?
- What external data do you consider the trump – you surely have to have some highlight?
- Of what traits of character you are proud?
- Do you have occupations, hobbies in which you succeed?
The way to how to win against shyness lies through understanding of the dostoynost, positivity and interestingness. You have to feel that you can interest surrounding people, to you is what to tell them about, you can have an expert opinion on certain questions, in a word, you do not look the complete fool, you the interesting and fascinating personality.
We submit with charm
Of course, first of all, interests you how to overcome shyness before the girl, and in it there is nothing surprising and shameful. In the nature a female only the alpha male owns, and all others stand, hesitating aside, and wait for the turn. But you can become an alpha a male for the pleasant female if you manage to hook on her attention.
The best council – it find the general subjects and improve the knowledge in those topics which interest it. Then, at least, you will manage to avoid awkward silence of which you are afraid most of all.
Do not you know how to learn that it is interesting to it? Look narrowly, it is even possible to determine a lot of things by appearance of the person for fractions of a second about character, interests, idols. Just try to distinguish to what actress it is similar and present what roles your blessed could play. If you have time, be prepared for acquaintance (this most terrible) – approximately having estimated its possible interests, you can approach under a pretext to receive expert opinion. Women, as well as men, like to seem useful experts.
From where does the shyness undertake?
In world scientific and fiction the whole Talmuds on origin of shyness and its roots in the childhood, to the nursed grievance, painful refusal, etc. are used up. Try to remember whether always you were timid and are not self-assured, or it began with a certain moment. The reasons of shyness can disappear in the deep childhood therefore it is not always possible to remember a reference point. But then, scroll in the head at least those situations in which because of shyness you did not try to obtain the desirable. Understand that everything could be in a different way, and you pogrustit a little bit.
And now be engaged in increase in a self-assessment and be engaged in the most useful affirmation which will help to remove the block from a brain. The reason always in a brain, in the eaten opinion that you wrong, bad, ugly, unwanted. Begin to tell and convince yourself of the return.