Couples which in everything come to a common denominator and do not quarrel, just does not exist. Sooner or later one of the parties or both provoke the conflict at once. As it is correct to work to the woman in such situations and what to tell the husband to reconcile, read below.
How to reconcile also what to tell the husband after the strong quarrel
The woman, even if it is not right, usually tries to find the first ways to reconciliation. On the one hand, it is not so bad to be able to make a compromise, but with another — too fast attempt to come into contact after rough scandal shows disrespect of the person for itself. Respectively, and the man will decide that it is possible to walk all over you, taking offense in an occasion and without. Means, the small pause has to become the first step. If you wait a little time, and then will begin to be reconciled, it will show understanding of a wrongfulness that will surely flatter his hurt pride. Besides, you will also be done good by a break.
Whether you know? The first what draws the attention of 20% of men to, having seen the woman, these are her hair.
During this time it will be possible:
- to cool the heat;
- to analyze a situation and to understand what became the decisive push which led to a quarrel;
- to consider a situation from the partner, to analyze his reactions to a stress;
- to make the further action plan taking into account specific features of the partner (fast otkhodchivost, snobbery, attempts to ego-trip and so forth).
However, there are situations when partners swore so strongly that business goes to a divorce. Here it is necessary to work strictly on a situation and taking into account a problem which caused the conflict.
If he does not make contact
There is a mass of ways to bring the partner to contact with itself. By and large it is possible to pick up option, even without humiliating own advantage if you do not want it, and without apologizing:
- To plan the general meeting with friends. A spontaneous party is what is necessary for a discharge of the heated situation. The spouse, perhaps, will thaw in the course of preparation for a meeting with friends, and if not, then for all evening will precisely try not to fall face down in dirt before other people. As soon as you notice that business moved off dead center, you can begin to work and to try to bring the husband to straight talk. The main thing is to analyse point by point in advance that you will tell not to provoke the new conflict.
- Try to surprise him — put on a sexy underwear, make a dinner from its favourite dishes. It will help to melt the spouse's heart.
- Try seducing option if previous did not yield positive result. Perhaps, the man who refuses to talk in the afternoon, to pleasure of signs your caress in the evening.
Important! At all do not resort to the help of mother (to the, the mother-in-law), girlfriends and friends. Intervention of strangers will cause still big hostility from the partner.
The simplest option is to come and ask forgiveness. In a conversation it is impossible to take all blame even if it so, but also not to try to accuse it of all sins. It is necessary to explain to the person that you realized the mistakes and now you wait from him for similar actions, you float in one boat, and the team solves everything together.
If business reached a divorce
The spontaneous quarrel does not lead to such consequences. Means, the conflict ripened long ago, and both partners closed eyes to all, or the man sought for parting, but did not know how to tell about it. In both cases it is necessary to sort things out at once. First of all it is necessary to solve whether you want to continue the relations. You should not act rashly. Take rest a little, take a break and think over the event. Only when passions will cease, it is necessary to start a conversation.
If both are guilty to the same extent or the man was strongly offended by you, it is necessary to talk frankly. The man should let know how much he means to you and that you are ready to make a compromise. At the same time describe the expectations and hopes about its further actions. Try to understand together with the partner that does not suit you in each other. It is possible even to try to make the list of pluses and minuses. It will help to estimate not only a negative side, but also will become good motivation for continuation of the relations. Ask to postpone a divorce for a while to try to adjust everything, finally from it nobody will lose anything.
If the man wanted to suspend relations long ago, begging, apologies and attempts to be for it an ideal wife will not help. In this case it is better to reconcile and release it. The fact that the man did not find time to tell the partner the truth about the intentions represents it in unfavourable light.
Whether you know? In the man the bigger desire is caused by the half-dressed girl, than completely undressed.
There are 2 options:
- he is a self-satisfied liar;
- he is too timid and quickly gives in to pressure from any other person.
Perhaps, he will give in on arrangements, but will be still unfortunate with you in marriage and will continue to deceive. In the relations the main thing — mutual trust and if partners are not capable to open each other, such marriage finally waits for a failure.
If to judge sensibly, in such situation the procrastination of the moment of a divorce will not do good to any of you. First of all the woman will hope that everything will improve, will grow together anew, to make plans and to rely on the partner. Finally she will turn out in a hole of a shame, self-flagellation and mistrust to a male that I will begin to destroy its own.
Rules of conduct during the quarrel with the husband
If you learn to behave correctly during the quarrel, it will give you bigger advantage before own partner, and it is possible, and will help to avoid similar situations from now on:
- Always think that to write to SMS. Do not tune the partner into continuation of the conflict in advance and especially do not write, being in anger.
- For the statement of the discontent select suitable time. If the partner runs home tired and dreams to fall in your embraces, then, having received on a threshold a remark from the wife about its inability to repair something in the house, to wash for himself a plate or to take children to school, at once will accept a defensive position or, on the contrary, at all will ignore everything told because he was strongly tired.
- Never raise the voice at a conversation with the husband. Let passions boil inside, but externally you need to keep calm — it will render soothing effect on the interlocutor. Shout with a fast otchekanivaniye of malicious phrases, will only aggravate situation. Such sound manipulations overload a brain of the interlocutor, and he cannot capture a conversation essense but only he convulsively tries to find a way of protection, respectively, shouts in reply, throwing caustic words.
- Do not drag in the whole lump to one problem. If the quarrel began with clarification of the reasons of delay home, then to remember lack of desire last Monday to go together to shop, silly and recklessly. Solve problems in process of their emergence — are dissatisfied now or upset, softly hint about it or tell directly. Then decide why your desires cannot be executed, and take a detached view of the offenses. They are sometimes simply funny.
- People tell the most bitter words in an anger rush — constrain yourself, do not offend the partner, to whom as not to you the nobility how to hit it more painfully. It is a right way to parting.
- Do not take a position of defense and the forward. Try to present information to the partner in the form of dialogue with an opportunity to express opinion and to discuss possible compromises.
- Always fix a point to which came upon termination of the conflict. If it is delays at work, so you have to be warned and so forth.
It is important! If the husband is ready too aggressively, it is better to leave from a conversation. Ask it to refuse a showdown in this period and to return to it in a couple of hours.
Useful tips to the wife
Any conflict situations can be resolved peacefully if it is not a beating from the husband. If the man raises a hand against you, it is necessary to leave and not to look back.
First of all it is necessary to learn to release offenses. All people have small shortcomings, and sometimes unwillingly they offend each other. Concentration on trifles leads to accumulation of the negative relation and in advance adjusts on a quarrel that does not do well to the relations.
How to reconcile with the husband if he is guilty
There are several decisions which need to be accepted depending on personal features of the partner. For example, if you know that sooner or later the guilty spouse will come to be reconciled, just wait for this moment and you do not force an event. For waiting time you will have an opportunity to be prepared for a conversation.
Such men who recognize the mistakes and approach the first, it is not enough. In the majority the men try to reserve the last word and do not approach to be reconciled not to restrain own ego. Still the reason can disappear that the partner is afraid. He feels fear to be rejected in attempts to deserve forgiveness. Anyway it is necessary to offer an open conversation.
The main thing in any situation is to keep self-control, without turning an informal conversation into the next scandal.
Important! Never complain in a rage rush of the husband to girlfriends, parents. You reconcile with it, and its reputation before other people will be hopelessly spoiled.
How to apologize to the husband if the wife is guilty
Not always the man appears an aggressor. Women are beings emotional and are inclined to aggressive manifestation of discontent with offenses, reproaches. Before apologizing, make the action plan.
Actions in such situation have to include several steps:
- Let's it cool down and recover. If right after the quarrel to begin to apologize, it will sound insincerely.
- Understand its position and assess a situation his eyes.
- Suggest to discuss a problem.
- Point to how it is expensive to your heart. Describe the nuances causing your discontent in other foreshortening.
- If you long did not talk, SMS can be the first step. Not childishness — sometimes it is simpler to write it, than to tell words.
- Touch the husband and embrace him — it will be the best way to ask forgiveness. Perhaps, it as the little boy, is eager for heat and caress after offense.
Family life is full not only the pleasant moments, in it take place and quarrels. The ability to solve the conflicts peacefully and to minimize them will become pledge of the long relations.