You met the man of a dream, between you the strong feeling flashed. You decided that you are ready to start with it a family and to get posterity. At some point you learn from the man that he was married, but divorced, and the ex-wife brings up their general child now. And here already is over what to think.
Information that your elect already has experience of family life for you can be ambivalent. On the one hand, in it there is a mass of pluses. The man with experience causes bigger trust. But in this story there can be also reefs. So, to what to be ready if you are going to get married for the man with the past.
1. With a high share of probability his ex-wife will try to return it. Even if she did not think of it, emergence of the serious relations in your couple can provoke it to these actions. Here two options of development. If this woman has sufficient wisdom, your chances to be with this man are sharply reduced. She will precisely act, knowing weaknesses of your elect it is better, than you. But if this woman acts, leaning on the emotions, then sooner or later her offenses and rage will make your work for you. In either case the man will know that he can always return to former, and this thought will be destructive to affect your relations.
2. Write down to yourself on a hand and learn: his children are forever. The earlier you realize it, the better.
3. Probability that the man's relatives will not be glad to you is high. There are two options of succession of events: or he will listen to the relatives, or he will quarrel with them. There are no in either case won.
4. Be ready that your man (I hope, not verbally) will compare you to the ex-wife. And everything is exposed to comparison, from a hairstyle to borsch. Try not to take offense and not to fall into the victim, and to self-improve. It is an excellent occasion to learn to volume valuable what its former succeeded in.
5. Your man long time will have sense of guilt before the former family. Be ready that the former spouse after a case will use it.
6. All conflicts which did not come to the end in former family, the man unconsciously will project on your relations. From there is a conclusion: listen carefully when it shares with you this delicate question. Build strategy in advance.
7. Be ready that your person will undergo denigration and gossips behind your back. You treat it more quietly. ""The dog barks - the caravan goes.""
8. If you got married, at first the spouse, perhaps, will not perceive you the wife. This vacant position in his consciousness will be taken by former. Do not react violently, it is physiology: the mentality needs time to reconstruct to a new situation.
9. The heaviest point: the man can not want some time children... There is no recipe, unfortunately, in this case. Decide that for you it is better. To wait when it ripens to posterity, not to wait, or any option.
If you found in yourself enough wisdom and patience and overcame these obstacles, I congratulate - you the happy owner of strong family!