It would seem, the woman in marriage tries to be very much convenient, loving, kind, careful, soft, in everything the wife pleasing to the husband. However the husband later divorces years her, leaving or to other woman, or just in anywhere. In what the reason? What moves such man? What is not enough for him in marriage with such wife?
On the consultations I happened to work with the young women standing on the brink of a divorce or who already remained lonely more than once. Seeing before itself quite attractive person, with a good figure, tidy, kind, soft, economic, there can really be a question: "What yet the husband lacked it?".
Plunging into the story by the client about how there was her family life what were created the relations with the husband, the answer to a question becomes obvious. Experience of consultation of the men who left such wives, probably, is capable to describe more precisely their motivation to break in relations.
I will not be mistaken, having told that, perhaps, to everyone men would like to see family as the reliable back. The family cosiness, rest and warmth in the relations with the wife is important for many men. But sometimes for some men the life in such "smooth water" becomes boring and monotonous. There is a feeling of "domestic squabbles" which enter men into apathy, extinguishes aspirations, does not give bright paints of life and feeling of the drive.
Near the dear, kind wife always waiting with a hot dinner on a table, appeasable, trying to please in everything, certainly, conveniently and comfortably. But there is no taste of life. There are no incentives and energy to aspire to something, to develop, reach new tops, to overcome difficulties, etc.
Almost all men noted fading of sexual interest in the wife. Sexual life with them became same boring and monotonous, as well as joint life. In it there were also not enough emotions, the drive, piquancy, an intrigue and the other components of intimate life exciting feelings, imagination and passion. Sex for them became something like execution of a conjugal duty and satisfaction of natural biological requirements. Though as my many clients noted, wives watched the appearance, tried to look good, it did not attract sexual interest.
Other important factor leading to loss of interest in wives, men noted that their women ceased to develop intellectually and socially. They kind of stopped at that level of development which was prior to a wedding. Over time to husbands became there is nothing to talk to the wife in the evenings, except discussion of family everyday issues and problems at work.
As a result, according to men, they had a feeling that they became limp and "took root in a sofa". Sooner or later such condition of "a never-ending calm" became for them intolerable. They considered marriage with the wife as the constraining force suppressing them former activity. Men noted that they sometimes would like some confrontations with the wife, disputes, aggravation of contradictions, some discomfort which would allow them to quicken. They even tried to create the conflicts in family, but wives quickly smoothed everything, made concessions, agreed to their requirements. The position of wives in everything to please and not to contradict husbands, in everything to agree with them, pushed men to escaping from this "a comfort zone" more and more to give itself freedom for self-development and advance.
Men noted that, having left the wife, they looked for such women with whom it would be desirable to try to keep step, with whom it was interesting to communicate, from whom they would learn a lot of new which motivated them to new achievements, etc. Parting with the wife of the man was considered as an opportunity to reach new level, to make a new round in life, having escaped from "a comfort zone".