Once he told: "I love you!", - it is sincere, with the burning eyes. And now you together. Then he several times repeated recognition, however, less emotionally. And now it seems also loves, but words about it. Why men do not speak about feelings?
Reasons
First of all, such is the men's nature. Men are less emotional as the nature "programmed" them on active action. The problem of ancient homo is to go, find, fill up an animal, to eat most and to feed tribespeople. To find the enemy and to kill him. To win favor of women, having defeated rivals.
It is worth weakening the severity for an instant, to show softness, - and everything, you lost. It is killed or eat scraps on the periphery of an area of human herd.
So there were hundreds of thousands of years, and for rather short piece of cultural development the human nature changed a little. Still in male consciousness to tell about good feelings it is opened - manifestation of weakness. And I like to say sincerely "You" means the next overcoming itself for it.
Often men consider sufficient to make a declaration of love once, and further already to show the attitude towards the woman actions. Over and over again to bring production (money, things and products), to broaden the territory and to provide it to the beloved (to buy the real estate, to carry in trips), to have with it sex.
At the same time, negative feelings and aggression of the man are usually shown without internal difficulties. Again, it by nature: aggression helped in the millennia with bloody fight for survival. The cultural person should apply the will to restrain when he feels rage.
Certainly, the external emotionality of the man is affected also by education. In many families it is not accepted to teach boys to show the best feelings openly. Like, "not as a real man" it. In other families it is considered normal to speak about love more fluently.
At last, the temperament matters. From the phlegmatic person constrained and closed in himself not always you learn whether the dinner was pleasant to him what to speak about verbal manifestations of feelings! And here it is much simpler to "hot" choleric person to express the attitude towards the woman.
What should I do?
But the woman needs so to hear more often from the satellite the words of love! It inspires her, does happier. How to achieve new recognitions?
Before everything not to vyklyanchivat a treasured phrase. If the man is not ready "to give" it, then he will say it formally, without any expression. It will hardly satisfy you.
Most to create a suitable emotional situation. To remind of feelings: most to tell about the love, to caress. And not to take offense if he all the same does not make a confession. Over time to repeat attempt.
If the man made a declaration of love, appreciate it. Remember that sincere recognitions for him come not really easily. Accept his words heat, do not laugh the matter off in reply. Otherwise next time you will hardly wait from it for sincere words.
You learn "to read love" on his look, gestures, actions. Accept it about gratitude. At the same time express the gratitude verbally more often: "Thank you that made that", "Thank you that did not forget to congratulate …", etc.
There is more. As psychologists note, in male consciousness after words there has to be an action. Told "I love" - means, it is necessary to make a feat. Some women use it.
Such at first extend recognition, and then demand something to make or to buy in confirmation of the told words. "Program" in the male head is started, he gets up and goes to execute it. And if suddenly does not go - that scandal for the sake of which termination the man usually nevertheless concedes.
And so, it is better to look for other ways of motivation of the elect. Otherwise he will come to a conclusion once that it is just used. And it is big blow to love.
If he talks about love endlessly …
... that it, on the contrary, has to guard. If, of course, the speech not about the beginning of the novel of young couple when lovers do not constrain feelings. Otherwise behind beautiful words the superficial feeling, painful dependence or cold calculation can be.
Here several types of men which tells much about feelings:
- Incorrigible romantic. They hotly fall in love, beautifully look after and revel in delights. But such "love boat" easily crashes against life. And soon it looks for new adventures until you are busy with productive work.
- Unripe, dependent personality. Because of features of education or other reasons he cannot live without the woman elected by it. He constantly reminds of the about love, but in exchange demands encouragement and awards. As if he is a domestic dog, but not the adult.
- He speaks about love, but he needs only sex and confirmation of the male solvency. At the same time he sometimes and itself is in love - but only with a beautiful body, and only when it belongs to it.
- Quite often husbands begin to speak often about feelings to the wife when they change or were guilty of something else. And beautiful words and gifts they try to lull into a false sense of security or to calm the conscience.
- He says that he loves, tries to obtain reciprocity, and then financial problems are found in him. He kind of unwillingly takes the money offered by you, giving in exchange millions "I love". In certain cases the man can be really not indifferent to the lady that does not prevent it "to live off" strong the beloved.