About a third of all women who decided to get married does not love the elect – came to such sad conclusion during the researches the British sociologist Jennifer Gauveyn. Over a question that pushes them on this step, it is possible to deliberate infinitely and not to come to a certain answer. Along with it there are many reasons why women marry unloved, and each of them has the right to life.
When the woman steps over a certain age boundary, remaining at the same time "old maid", she can make the decision to marry the one who is unloved it, but always be near and is ready to make it party. It can be the very old friend or the colleague, the neighbor or the companion of the husband of the best friend. Yes anyone. The woman understands that the best years for a marriage, constructions of a cozy house nest, the birth of children, etc. leave. And she can convince herself that there is nothing to wait further that in the long term only work, lonely evenings and envy to girlfriends who she is married long ago or already managed to divorce and again to connect to someone destiny.
Age boundary when it is time in marriage, each woman defines for herself. For one it is 30 years, for another 35, and someone and in 25 considers that its train leaves and it is necessary to manage to jump in the last car.
Fear of loneliness
The girl can marry in a hurry literally for the first comer if by this moment all her girlfriends already have families. To go to the altar she is pushed by fear of loneliness and also painful consciousness that it is worse than others that nobody looks at it and wishes to build the strong and long relations. In this situation it is important not to acquire to himself complexes and not to fall into despair. As a rule, fear of loneliness at young age – a far-fetched problem which time will help to solve. Another matter if it is about not the really young woman or in general elderly. Such lady can marry unloved, using this opportunity as the last chance of rescue from the future lonely old age.
The last chance to marry even unloved can drop out at any age. But all this happens to a thicket to women aged. Of course, the love can unintentionally appear suddenly also these years, but patiently it is already simple to wait for it there is no time. And who will condemn the elderly lady if she connects the life to the worthy person, let unloved, but reliable and understanding.
Hopelessness, mental anguish
If in life of the woman there was a drama event (a divorce, the husband threw or changed), then to muffle loss pain, she seeks to cast in the lot with other person quicker. Unloved, but, perhaps, divided with it her pain. One moment is sad in this situation – if the woman continues to love the ex-husband. Hardly it will find calm in new marriage …
Desire to leave parents
Often in life happens so that the longer parents and children live together, the it is more than disagreements and misunderstanding arises in their relations. For example, rest is necessary for the father with mother, and the daughter wants to invite to herself friends and to have fun. There comes the moment when she is not able to maintain cohabitation any more, and, the suitable case is hardly sprained to marry, she uses it if only to leave parents.
Happens that parents, wishing to marry quicker the daughter, find her more or less suitable candidacy and convince her that more than such chance can not be – years leave, and something is not visible to line of grooms, and this agrees …
The man is rich, successful, influential. Made proposal. To refuse – it is silly, to agree – and how love? The woman begins to weigh everything pros and cons before accepting the offer. Quite often the top resigns. The love cannot and wait, not to all it comes, and to miss such chance simply ridiculously, then all life will be whipping the cat. Than without love and without money, it is better without love yes with money. All this, of course, very personally and individually but to judge the woman for such decision – business ungrateful.
The silliest and unreasonable option is to marry unloved out of revenge, to spite of someone. More often – to the former groom or the husband, sometimes – the girlfriend, is more rare – to parents, relatives. Perhaps, such marriage brought nobody happiness. In this context it represents unimaginable torture for both with a sad outcome.