Developing and maturing, each child gradually gets acquainted with the world around himself and learns rules of existence in it. One of problems of education – to help the child to understand beyond what framework it is impossible to go and why. On this way it is necessary to put restrictions in the form of punishments.
How to make that punishment was not just "payment" for a bad act, and both a lesson on the future and way to correct the done harm? To resort to punishments as seldom as possible, it is necessary to try to prevent an undesirable situation. For this purpose follows:
- to explain to the child why it is impossible to act this way and whenever possible to show results of disobedience; • to explain that there are categorical bans forever (it is impossible to run out on the road) and temporary (today it is very cold, it is impossible to walk, but when becomes warmer, we will go to the hill);
- rules have to concern all, and not just the child (hands have to brush teeth and to wash all) and always; • it is necessary to consider age (requirements to the preschool child and the teenager have to be different). But if it is necessary to resort to punishment, then: • it is necessary to do it quietly, not in an anger rush. Inhale deeply several times, tell yourself: "Tranquility!", and then act; • for different offenses – different penalties. Punishment for the fact that put out the tongue at the neighbor and for the fact that threw packages from a balcony, cannot be identical; • punishment has to answer age. The preschool child perceives time not as the adult, and he is useless to be punished half a day later, for the teenager normal will be to postpone analysis of a situation until evening. The two-three-year-old will not be able long to stand in a corner or to sit quietly therefore for it three-five minutes of a corner will be enough.
What forms of punishment are admissible: • penal works (to put away the scattered garbage, to wash up the ornamented wall); • the fairy tale for the kid with the heroes making similar offenses and the analysis "why is impossible" and "as it is correct"; • isolation (corner, chair); • deprivation pleasant (computer, sweets); • self-punishment (to allow to spill on itself cold water); • shout and a strict voice (the measure that children did not cease to react is necessary too); • severe look; • an explanation (when offense is made for the first time and the child does not understand that in it bad). There are adults who consider that the only effective punishment – physical. But experience testifies to the return. Physical punishment is inadmissible as: • the sensitivity threshold decreases over time and the child does not react to anything, except a belt; • the child tries in any way to avoid punishment (lies, hides the diary, hides from parents); • considers cruelty norm and resolves all issues by means of fists; • the child choleric person will not reconcile to punishment and will try "to give delivery". Not better than a beating and moral humiliation, evil sneers. Probability of the same acts very high, parents can hear the same from the grown-up children. There are cases when the child is capricious, shouts, spills food, etc. because he: • was strongly tired and wants to sleep; • only just woke up; • ached, but strong indications of a disease are not visible yet; • endured a severe stress or a trauma (death, a terrible scene). In these cases it is impossible to punish. It is better to calm, put the kid to bed, embrace or begin treatment. In education the respect for the personality, attention and desire to understand which form trusting relationship and mutual love is important.