Psychologists consider that people are divided into egoists who live only for themselves, and altruists who live for others to the detriment of themselves. There are, of course, also those which try to combine love for themselves and respect for others, arriving in compliance with the arising situation.
Comfortably to communicate with all people and to find a common language with the family, it is necessary to be able to consider not only the interests, but also wishes of people around. Especially it concerns the relations of the husband and wife. However if the husband the egoist also does only that he wants, it is quite difficult. The spouse in this case has three options of reactions to such relation: to leave, reconcile or try to change a situation.
In the beginning the relations both partners try to show the best sides and love does not allow to estimate darling soberly. But shortcomings are all the same shown over time. When the woman understands that her husband the egoist also does only that he wants, she, of course, can make the decision to leave him and to find the happiness in other place. However it is extreme option, and before it is possible to try to keep family and to correct a situation.
Some women believe that they will be able to affect egoism of the spouse. It is possible to force it to change the relation, to listen to the second party and to do something for general welfare. Usually such attempts begin with soft requests and offers. The woman wants to believe that if she asks the husband to put, for example, dirty things in a basket for dirty linen at once, then he will obey and will adopt similar rules. Let not from the first, but over time the husband will be able to satisfy any given requests of the spouse. Most often it is impossible to change the person. He can want to exchange and even to try to make attempts to make to the spouse pleasant. But practice of the family relations shows that similar changes of a vremenna, and habits and own opinion – is constant. The person will change in case to him it is comfortable in a new state. It is possible to talk to the husband, to explain to him positive and the downside of his behavior. Only it is not necessary to swear at a conversation. Let the man will see in you not the quick-tempered person, but the sedate woman for the sake of whom he also will change.
Wisest, of course, to stop trying to change the spouse, to accept him it what it is, and to focus attention on his positive traits of character. It is necessary to try to see his point of view in what it does and why it does it quite so. The similar philosophical relation to life helps to preserve nervous system and to keep the relations in family. Making the decision what to do when the husband arrives just as only he wishes, the spouse needs to understand what she wants – to be right or to remain happy. Sometimes it is necessary to choose only one of these options. The wisdom to the woman comes with life experience, and in several years you remember that you were too exacting to the spouse.