Most often to girlfriends councils are followed by women when they have problems in the relations with an opposite sex. In reply from girlfriends in such situations get the mass of advice, as on business, and at all useless. Or even dangerous to and the relations. Before following advice, properly over it think. There are such councils that you should not carry out them.
1. The most frequent council that girlfriends allow – not to show an initiative. Strangely enough, it concerns not only men, but also work, career, study and many other things. Careful girlfriends want that you did not lean out and obediently waited when: the man the first will call, the administration, at last, will notice and will estimate, and the teacher in higher education institution will propose your candidature on the grandee or a conference. But it is necessary to take this advice, well having thought over everything and having weighed. Everything depends on a situation. The administration often loves initiative, and in the interpersonal relations the first to a thicket are called by those who has more time. So think before working.
2. In respect of the relations between the man and the girlfriend's woman very often advise to refuse sex to the man if you are dissatisfied with something. Council became undoubtedly outdated. If you are interesting to the man as the personality, it will affect him a little. If he with you only because of sex, then it or is in rage and all the same will not solve a problem, or will go to look for what you did not give on the party. Such relations will not for long hold on. If you are dissatisfied with something, do not arrange sexual boycott, and talk to the partner. Directly tell the man what disturbs you, and try to solve together a problem or to reach compromise.
3. If advise you not to dramatize a situation, or it is worse than that, on your complaints throw out even more the problems, properly think whether that is a girlfriend. The understanding girlfriend will listen, will support and will calm. But will not begin to persuade you that everything is not so bad. As far as everything is bad, only you can see and solve. And if you think now that everything is very bad, means indeed. Means, you are in such psychoemotional state that you perceive a situation extremely negatively, or it is really very bad situation. In that case it is necessary to calm down and take measures, but not to persuade itself that everything is good.
4. If advise you to keep the relations at any cost for the sake of children, then these people obviously do not wish anything good to either you, or your children. The relations that make you unfortunate, hurt also your children. Before eyes of the growing child there has to be the correct behavior model. And the more so you should not listen to such council if the partner shows in relation to you violence. Think what you teach the child to and you that he lived as you would like? Suffering in the relations, you torment also yourself, both the partner, and children. You should not keep the relations only for the sake of children, it is the senseless victim.
5. Council to become more womanly it is possible to hear at any age. But at once think and whether understands you giving it. A concept of femininity at everyone the. And it will be difficult to estimate you to other person. If wish well to you, most likely, you will advise something more concrete to make, for example, manicure if you started the nails. The main thing, it to be itself, and the loving and careful people near you have to help you to find themselves that you were happy. Council to be womanly, sounds more as insult and no matter who gives it.
6. At once run from people who advise you to leave and say that you not couple with the partner. First, to remain or leave only you have to solve. Careful girlfriends can support your decision only. Secondly, and where they were earlier when the situation did not demand parting? It is better not to discuss the relations with the man with friends at all. Every time when you have problems, girlfriends can remember a heap of things that you told earlier and all last problems. In the relations of couple there have to be only he and she, all other superfluous.
7. One more ridiculous council from girlfriends – you should not get divorced and receive the status "divorcee". Such advice can be got besides at any age if you lived half a year or twenty years, with children and without them. Many really are afraid of the similar status and suffer for years the painful relations. If you made the decision, you should not be afraid. The world very quickly changes and the similar status is already not so terrible as 50 years ago. And the more so our world is very different what only people and opinions you will not meet now. There is a mass of the people who are absolutely normally belonging to the divorced women.
8. Many can advise you to give birth to the child that everything got better. Or to give birth to the child that he married you. Or to bring the child right after the wedding. Anyway council – to give birth to the child it is very harmful. Both parents have to have a decision to bring the child. The child not means to save or arrange a situation. The child is a personality whom you create and is brought up not only by you, but also your partner. And the decision to bring the child has to be the general.
9. Council – to fall in love with what is pleasant to it and if it does not turn out to pretend that it so. You should not torment yourself and to try to fall in love with rats if you do not transfer them to spirit, and darling of soul in them does not hope. You have to look soberly at a situation and if the interests of the partner attract interest of you, then it is possible to get acquainted with them better. And if you fall in love with them at you will become a little more than the general if is not present, in it there is nothing terrible.
10. Council not to be exacting or not to ask about much, is also harmful both to you and to the partner. If you obviously underestimate the requirements or do not tell everything, you whether you will understand that it is the partner that will be able to provide you and to make happy. You dream of the cottage, and say to the partner that you have enough apartment, or you will not wait for a cottage or sooner or later you with the partner will find out that you think and dream of a miscellaneous. It belongs not only to days, but also to personal aspirations. If you always dreamed of the higher education, but for the sake of the partner went to an average, it will not make better either you, or him. You will not be satisfied. Understand what you want actually and share the desires honestly with the partner even if he falls short of them. You he will understand it is ready to aspire to bigger with you or for the sake of you or not. To hide the desires and dreams and to demand less from itself, the partner and life do not cost, it is a way to dissatisfaction and misfortune. If you have dreams and increased requirements, seek for their realization.