Sometimes there is a feeling of abnormality of life, it as if goes not as it was planned. And not those people around, and not such relationship of which dreamed. There is a painful question: "Why so superficial relations? And how it is possible to build up the serious relationship?" The most important is not to forget that two parties always participate in the relations.
Instruction
1. Answer yourself a question: Whether "You want to live with this person for many years". In a condition of love the people are happy and, often, are blind. They do not notice or do not want to notice unpleasant lines in darling, it seems that the love is capable to change everything, even character, darling will be such as there is a wish to see it. And it is the first mistake on the way to the serious relations. And it is necessary to notice, analyze what relations at darlingof person with other people. Realize – the same style of the relations will be also in family. If you are able to look at darling, having taken off pink glasses, then will be able to answer the question, most important for yourself whether you want to live with this person for many years. Try to imagine everyday life, long evenings together. And now analyze the feelings. Whether it is comfortable to you? Whether there are no unpleasant feelings? Also be honest with themselves, do not deceive yourself.
2. The second, important question on which you have to find the answer: by what rules you want to live with the person close to you. For example, it is very important for you that all things lay on the places, and on those which were defined for them by you. It is necessary that the partner respected such relation to an order. Or you very much like to go to theater, do not miss any premiere. And if your partner does not divide your hobby, then let do not disturb you and does not forbid. As well you have to respect what is important for the person close to you. It is necessary to understand whether you are ready and your partner to compromises.
3. Talk with each other. You say with the partner about what you or him concerns. Also you say much because the person can change, respectively, also his attitudes, outlook, values change. Here in this talk when you discuss joint plans, governed, put, and your serious relationship is built up. It is similar to immersion in sea depths. There is a large number of doubts: and whether there will be enough oxygen, but whether there will be no something under water. In the relations with darling there is something similar. And suddenly will not understand, will turn away? Of course, misunderstanding, incorrect conclusions, offenses are possible. But tell, please, how still it is possible to understand that is wanted by other person who he imagines family life, without discussing all these issues? At the same time it is important not only most to express, but to hear and understand opinion of other party.