The divorce of parents is almost always a reason for painful experiences of children. The weak mentality of the child is exposed to big loading, he needs to understand and host this event radically changing all his former life.
Instruction
1. If there is such opportunity, report to the child about the forthcoming divorce for some time before fulfillment of this event. The your explanatory speech, the better will be simpler and more clear. Consider age of your child.
2. Convince the kid that all of you equally, despite everything, love him that it all the same will have mom and dad who will always love it. Tell the son or the daughter that he (she) everything will also communicate with dad (or mom), just now dad (mom) will separately live, in other place. Perhaps, the following phrase will approach, for example: "We with dad decided to live separately, in different houses. But despite this, all of us equally you very much love" or "So it turned out that mom moves, more she with us will not live, but all of you equally will see each other so much how many you will want".
3. Try to explain intelligibly to the child that he is not guilty of this situation at all that at adults it sometimes happens and doomsday with arrival of this event will not be. Emphasize that the decision on a divorce is made by you finally and irrevocably.
4. Find the powerful argument explaining why you decided to live separately. Rely in explanations on its personal children's experience, tell, for example, the following: "Remember when dad swore, you told: …" or "And you remember when dad took offense at all, you …". Remember several such situations in order that the kid established connection between those "pictures" which he saw, with the subsequent divorce of parents.
5. Prepare that the child again also will return to this subject again. It is peculiar to children. Explain and repeat many times what is unclear for the kid. Do not keep silent when the child asks you the questions concerning him. Pretending that nothing happened, you aggravate a situation even more.
6. Do not look for acting through the kid of the ally in fight against the former spouse or the spouse. Do not incite the child against dad who "threw" him (or mothers).
7. Give to the daughter or the son a possibility of an emotional discharge: let will a little cry, will shout, will release the feelings. Exhausting them inside, the kid can get a chronic stress.