The child had an imagined friend. Because of the fictional, nonexistent and composed by imagination of the beloved child characters to parents it becomes disturbing. Really children cannot find real friends, differently why to the kid these stories? Or everything is not so terrible?
The imagined friend – the character who is thought up by the child. Children communicate with a fruit of the imagination or are on friendly terms. Quite often thought up characters seem to their creators very real though the child understands that the friend actually does not exist.
Everything is all right! or Guard!
By striking example of such invisible friend it is possible to call Carlson. This fairy tale character is known to all. But not everyone knows that in his honor the syndrome is called. So call inventing of the imagined partner.
The children's imagination is not limited to anything. The kid is capable to construct a supersonic rocket of chairs and a blanket. The whole world disappears in a big box, and the electric guitar with success is replaced by a usual broom. With such imagination neither the child, nor his parents should miss.
It is no wonder that the child enjoys appearance of the new friend. Only ill luck: nobody sees this friend except the kid. Invisible friends are recognized by an everyday occurrence for 3-5-year-old remains. At this age the imagination violently develops.
Crisis of three-year age already behind. From mom the kids of already separate, they feel independence, feel own requirements and desires. Here only neither to sound them, nor the kid is capable to formulate yet.
Quite often parents perceive appearance of the invisible friend with concern. Such phenomenon as the imagined friend is considered to be something like an aberration.
It is because it is more habitual to adult to estimate the world from the bell tower, being guided in all by logic and gravity. But for the adult personality and for the nursery the thought-up companions – a huge difference.
Invisible friends at all not such rarity. And it is confirmed by modern researches.
Why it appeared?
So why to the child the imagined friend? At observation of the kid who got such companion it is possible to learn much. There is visible even the fact that parents did not even suspect about the offspring.
In its games with the invisible being both problems of the kid, and complexity of all his family are reflected:
- Excessive pressure.
- Lack of new impressions.
- Shortage of communication.
So, if in the house pressure and hyper guardianship prospers, then and the child suppresses invisible fellow. He forbids them everything, orders them. Possibly, he duplicates what occurs in family with him. Thus, parents can look from the party and at themselves.
If the kid from reality all the time runs to the world where he can behave as will wish, then in it other aspect of hyper guardianship is expressed. The similar type of behavior is chosen by the kids suffering from sense of guilt.
They or punish phantom characters in the imaginations, or on the contrary save from punishments. Parents should find out because of what the child feels for himself such guilty.
And, maybe, it is good?
If to the baby not enough new impressions, at it arise invisible fellow. Children can endure the whole sea of the most interesting adventures in the world of imaginations. There is a solution and from such situation: to entertain the child. It is possible to descend with him in a zoo, children's theater, on a swing, at last. It is worth to remember about telling of fairy tales. If the whole day is taken with new impressions, not prior to games with the imagined friends here.
When adults are busy by either younger children, or work, or the affairs, the kid lacks communication. Possibly, it has difficulties in communication with peers. It is necessary to communicate with the child as much as possible: he nevertheless is more important than other problems.
But by modern psychologists it is proved that with not smaller enthusiasm play with the imagined companions and those children who have brothers, sisters there are a lot of friends in reality. Appearance of the invisible being is not influenced by the width of a circle of contacts.
With the thought-up friend of the baby quite often "lose" all the secret desires:
- If the kid dreams that the imagined companion protected him, so the child and in reality needs protection.
- If in imaginations the kid punishes someone, it is quite probable that it is necessary to solve a problem with the psychologist.
- When the baby just likes to play with the invented puppy, maybe, it is time for it to buy a doggie indeed.
How to work with the adult
Not their ignoring and not ostentatious acceptance in family will become the best way of solving the problem of the imagined friends. It is much more productive to provide to the child most to solve extent of interaction of adults with the imagined friend.
It is possible even to accompany, adding the excess device at a table, to listen to all stories and to take an interest in health of new Carlson. It is only important to draw a clear boundary between an invention and life in reality: the child himself, but not thought up friends has to be responsible for the acts.
Outsiders to parents to be difficult. However if desired it is possible to notice that there are certain regularities of appearance of invisible companions and their behavior. So, they can come on a visit when mom and dad start a quarrel.
But it is optional to baby to invent the friend for self-defense. Most often desire of the kid to have a good time and fun is the reason of appearance of the illusory companion.
Usually by 7-9 years of the invisible being in itself disappear. If the similar friend was brought at the child is much more senior than seven years on condition of absence in children's life of serious injuries and changes, it is quite probable that it is a signal: it is necessary to visit the children's psychologist.