conflict of generations. What is it caused by? And how with it to be? In what the reason for so often found hatred between the mother-in-law and the son-in-law? The fact is that most of men do not even try to find a common language with the wife's mother. And mothers-in-law, in turn, not seldom on a cut do not want to accept the elect of the daughter.
The essence of the conflict is that mother does not want to give the little daughter into strange hands. It so long brought up it and raised, and now just has to give it to some foreign man. The young man considers that the girl whom he loves completely belongs to him.
But the essence of the conflict is usual is very veiled, and often the mother-in-law and the son-in-law do not even understand in what offense. Just there is some unclear hostility, scandals on trifles begin: not so washed the dishes, not so hung up clothes, not so told something.
It is peculiar to the mother-in-law, being assigned to the wide life experience, to touch upon a responsibility subject to hook on the son-in-law for live. This subject — is most painful for men, in particular when responsibility is their weak point. The mother-in-law is constant points to the son-in-law to what he could not make where it made mistakes and so on. And it is not pleasant to men most of all. Here also the conflict is fomented.
What to do that the relations were normal?
The Vedic philosophy gives several advice about it.
First, as actually and in the relations the daughter-in-law mother-in-law, the man has to treat the wife's parents even better, than own. And it has to be sincere, that is has to be confirmed by manifestation of feelings, but not just words. If the man finds what role mother played in life of his wife how many efforts she made to bring up such beautiful daughter, and will begin to appreciate it, then soon the conflict at the subconscious level will come down to zero. Here and fine friendly, even perhaps related relations.
Simply kindly it is much more difficult to mother-in-law to treat the daughter's elect, than the daughter. Because, as a rule, a lot of things forgive to the children and accept a lot of things. And with strangers the situation is absolutely in a different way therefore even the small offense can sit down for a long time at heart at the mother-in-law.
If the mother-in-law very strongly climbs in the relations of spouses, then the conflict not to pass. Often so happens that mother just does not give the daughter and continues to control her, without understanding that it already adult and it has own family. In that case the man has to fulfill the duties as the head of the family. He has to designate accurately borders of possible intervention for the mother-in-law. But, the most important, he has to make it yours faithfully to the mother-in-law and having shown as far as he appreciates her daughter. He has to convince the wife's mother that now he will fulfill her duties, in relation to the daughter. And that he will really preserve her, to love and care for her as it was done by mother. The man has to show responsibility in relation to the new family.
It is important to remember an essence of such conflict and to avoid quarrels it is necessary to respect opinion of each other. However it is the best of all for your young family to live separately from parents and only from time to time to visit them.