You do not love me at all!, I know that for you it is better, If you make it, I will leave you, Nobody understands me!. If you at least once heard these phrases, can be sure – tried to manipulate you. We also often sin with similar expressions. And the purpose at them one – to achieve desirable result. Since childhood, we learned to deceive, dodge and to blackmail interlocutors to receive the desirable. However nobody wants and likes to be deceived. Even if the manipulator is the loved one and does not feel sorry to you for the evil at all. And if business concerns manipulations in business communication, then here at all it is necessary to be on the alert and not to give in on provocation.
For a start it is necessary to define whether try to manipulate you. For this purpose listen to the feelings. If you talk to the person who tries to influence you, you, undoubtedly, feel feeling of inconvenience and awkwardness. You feel at once those emotions which you should feel in case of non-performance of a request of the manipulator. Our mentality is so arranged that we can be manipulated by means of such feelings as envy, pride, offense, shame and fear. A manipulator task only to enter us into that situation where we will have these unpleasant feelings and we will give in on provocation. That it did not occur, it is important know what types of manipulations in communication can influence you:
- intimidation. This type of manipulations comprises intonations of threat, use of words and expressions life-threatening, or to your safe existence;
- hidden coercion. By means of fallacies, fast switching of topics of conversation and also uses of ambiguous phrases, can force you to make any given decision when you do not realize it;
- emotional provocation - is directed to emergence at the person of the negative emotions and experiences which are slowing down reaction to the events during the conversation;
- complication. Introduction of the person to delusion by means of false or not until the end of the told information.
Manipulations in business communication
The certain place in psychology is taken by manipulations in business communication. Going for negotiations, or you remember an important meeting existence of several receptions:
- infection. In other words, imposing to the person of own views of a situation or the psychoemotional state. Is implemented at the expense of nonverbal means of communication – gestures, a mimicry, a rhythm and tempo of speech;
- motivation. Creation at the person of positive motives to performance of the purposes of the manipulator, forming of logical reflections in its advantage;
- ignoring. It is applied in a situation when the manipulator intentionally tries to lower a self-assessment of the interlocutor, scornfully treats his ideas and thoughts. In this case the manipulator specially does not notice the speech and judgments of the partner, avoids visual contact, than causes feeling of uncertainty and uneasiness in the partner;
- depreciation. It is used for the purpose of the psychological pressure upon the interlocutor. The manipulator publicly derides thoughts and proposals of the partner, calls into question into competence of the interlocutor of the discussed subject, tries to lower his self-assessment and to cause feeling of diffidence.
Ways of neutralization of manipulation in communication
The set of all these receptions is capable to unsettle the person and to force it to doubt own forces. However in time the psychology of communication allows manipulations, there are also ways of their neutralization. Not to fall into a trap the manipulator, it is necessary to acquire for itself several methods of opposition to attempts to affect your behavior and decision-making:
- Avoiding a discussion. The method allows, accidentally to turn to the attack of the manipulator a deaf ear. For this purpose it is enough to simulate phone call, accidental to drop something, or to find a mote in an eye. It will help to confuse the manipulator and to win time.
- To place points over i. The method allows to confuse the manipulator, having announced to it directly its actions and having told about its true motive. Why you try to impose me it? Do you want to anger me?.
- Reciprocal manipulation. Is implemented due to use of reciprocal means of manipulation. This method demands an exit to open confrontation with the manipulator. Thus it is possible to beat off its attack and to force to make the unprofitable decision against own will.
And finally. If you noticed, methods of manipulation in communication with the partner, do not hurry to expose the interlocutor. It is much more interesting to watch how the person tries to impose you the point of view or to compel you to adoption of the decision not favorable to you. In such situation you have fine trumps in the form of counterarguments or an open statement that you know true motives of the manipulator. Be self-assured and do not give in on provocation, then you will begin to be respected involuntarily and any attempts of manipulation will be useless.