What to do if your son - the gay

What to do if your son - the gay

There are different views on homosexuality - as among scientists, and ordinary people. Some consider it an aberration and even a disease, others - only manifestation of personal features of any given person. Much who learned that their relative - the gay, it is necessary to form own opinion.

When the teenager says that he is a gay

First of all, it is necessary to understand whether correctly parents understood the son. If the young man is still young and has no owing to obvious reasons of sufficient experience, perhaps, he is just tormented by doubts, and maybe so that he pursued the aim to shock parents. At the age of 13-15 years the mentality is still formed, and the teenager sometimes not in forces independently to understand the desires and thoughts. During this period for parents the preservation of psychological comfort in family that the child with any questions and problems could address the senior family members is especially important.

To parents who cannot find forces adequately to apprehend and quietly to react to the fact that their son the gay, it is possible to ask for the help the psychologist who will help to cope with emotions and to think structurally.

Therefore it is necessary to try to react to this news quietly. Otherwise next time the child it will not be simple to report to parents about any changes in the life because of fear to cause inadequate reaction. Instead of reprimanding, trying "to rake over the coals" to the offspring, it is better to try to ask him - why he considers that he became a gay. Does it haveDoes it haveDoes it have already an experience or just it interests him and also to understand, than similar interest can be attracted. Quite often at early age the teenagers can shock intentionally or spontaneously surrounding with similar statements though in fact they are quite far from changing traditional sexual orientation.

If during the conversation with the son it becomes clear that he only wants to be a gay, and parents are ready categorically against, it is possible to try several options. In similar cases the help of the psychologist can be very useful, to the expert it is possible to descend as separately, and together with the son. Nobody can guarantee that he "will cure of homosexuality", but the psychologist can help the teenager to understand himself, to solve the available psychological problems or to grope "painful" places in subconsciousness. And then the child who said until recently that he is a gay can realize that he at all him is not.

To try to understand and accept

When the person of more advanced age, with already died reports about the nonconventional orientation, to parents can be even more difficult to accept it - much enough not simply, telling, for example, about the children at work, to tell: "My son - the gay". Nevertheless, it is worth trying at first will focus that the son himself came and told about it. Means, he does not want to suppress this fact from parents, hoping for their understanding. Parents can quite ask some time to accept these data - perhaps, for some it can become a stress. Especially sharply those parents who hoped to get grandsons shortly can react.

It is possible to try to present mentally various options of succession of events - from the most unpleasant, to quite safe. Having chosen the desirablest of possible result, it is worth seeking to realize it.

In a special way the situation is if parents learned that their son - the gay from strangers. Or, for example, saw it in an environment and circumstances which can be interpreted in only one image. And in this case it is worth waiting, so far the first impression or maybe anger and disappointment, or the stress caused by experiences will cease. Then it is worth trying to talk frankly to the son about as far as his choice is conscious and also as he sees the further life.

Author: «MirrorInfo» Dream Team