Psychologists pay special attention to a problem of crises of the relations which come after the wedding. So much porasskazano and ponapisano about these problems that people do not hurry to get married any more as in soul there lives the fear that the relations will break up at once after the magnificent celebration.
But not only in marriage there comes crisis in the relations. Quite often this crisis attacks people even before marriage, especially, if they often meet. It is considered that the love lives three years, then it is eaten by life. Flowers are presented only on holidays, sex happens only on days off. The young couple does not hesitate to seem before each other in the stretched sweaters and with beer any more. To solve this problem in the relations, it is necessary to establish its reason.
Causes of quarrels and misunderstanding
The banal boredom is the main reason of leaving of love. Somehow to diversify the relations, young people begin to carp to each other on trifles, such as sluggishness, loud stamping by legs, champing, the slightly opened mouth during sleep, etc.
The impossibility to devote itself to itself can become the second cause of the conflicts. The second partner constantly is present, there is no opportunity to remain alone with himself. The long relations without hint on their logical conclusion, that is marriage, can cross out your love. Because of it there are infinite cavils to each other apropos and without cause. Actually, the relations last longer, the wedding probability is less. Partners get used to each other so that they do not perceive themselves any more as the potential husband and the wife. Rather they become friends (or enemies that is more probable).
How to solve these problems
As soon as in your relations there came such crisis, they should be legalized. It will save you from boredom. At least for one or two months. So far you will prepare for a wedding, to solve the numerous problems connected with preparation of a celebration, to strive on that everything was by the highest category, for boredom just there will be no time left. Thereof your relations will play new bright paints. If crisis entered already such phase that rather break in relations, than a wedding approaches, then try to avoid half-words. Accurately formulate what you want from your relations, from the partner that does not suit you. Than to be silent and save in itself offense and irritation, discuss with darling everything sore and disturbing you. Organize to yourself one day of personal time when you are able to take care of the own life. If you already live together, then organize to yourself personal space where you will be able to have a rest and think. Think of for what you fell in love with the partner, but not about why you are ready to stop loving him. The love in life is a heavy work. It is necessary to be ready for the sake of the relations to make mad acts. It is absolutely not as simple to love someone as it seems. To love, means to sacrifice itself in something, gradually approaching darling.
At everyone the
There is no universal council how to keep love before marriage. At each couple the reasons for disagreements. But if to appreciate each other and the love, then these disagreements will seem something insignificant. The most important is to respect each other and to build the relations on mutual understanding. If there is no mutual understanding yet, then by means of a talk it can achieve. Work on yourself, make plans, solve problems together. If to solve the small conflicts, then they will never develop into large quarrels.