Not to offend the partner, many women diligently represent passionate groans in a bed, without having satisfactions. Every time after that they hesitate to admit that at all it was not so good, and make all this again, both again, and again. How to get out of a vicious circle?
New reasons for pretense
If in days of old sex was considered as occupation only for satisfaction of men and women imitated indescribable pleasure only in order that quicker to finish it, then now everything is not so simply. Anyway, modern women continue to play the game ""show a reliable orgasm"", but already for absolutely other reason. Now the ability to receive an orgasm is an indicator not of so female solvency as mistresses, and men's art in a bed. And quite often to help the man to feel the courage and skilfulness in love, women resort to old tricks - to pretense.
Why it is not necessary to lie
Orgasm - not just the culmination of sexual intercourse. It is a point of the highest corporal pleasure. When partners lie each other about an orgasm, about what is pleasant and that is not pleasant, both of them lose from it. The feigned orgasm involves sexual experience which is unsatisfactory for both partners.
When the woman is not satisfied, she usually lies to the man to save his ego. The man also cannot think that something occurs not and that the woman actually did not test an orgasm. Therefore, the conversation about desires and preferences in a bed between partners will not take place again. The woman considers that she by means of such lie protects the man, but as a result remains is disappointed. To all other, she misses an opportunity to educate him. As a result partners appear in a vicious circle.
There are several steps which couple can make for achievement of mature sexual communication.
You speak about it
Nainitie a conversation from the fact that the frankness is very important for you and that the pleasure of the partner is also very important for you. Ask the correct questions, for example:
- What do you like?
- What it is unpleasant to you?
- Perhaps, something from what I do is pleasant to you more? And why?
- Whether there is in that, what are you doing for me, something that is not pleasant to you?
- Whether there is something like that that we did not try yet, but it would be interesting to you?
Usually after such conversation the woman feels free from pretense and a lie. She will not need to imitate more, and thanks to it she will feel more freely and is liberated. Also will begin to investigate the sexuality anew.
Change the point of view
Get acquainted with each other bodies, investigate and study them as the card. Genitals - not all. Remember that before you the person. Caress a neck, a back, a waist, practise in contacts. Try to popraktikovat so-called power contacts, contacts without contact. Just bring closer a hand to the partner's body, but do not touch. Try slow sex even if you are already slow, slow down even more. Do not try to achieve any result, just enjoy each other bodies.
Do not forget about feedback
Tell the man that you need more time ""on a warming up"", and be not afraid of the fact that during a prelude he can get bored. Most of men, seeing what pleasure is felt by their partner and result, are ready to repeat then the same long process again and again.
Recognition that you imitated an orgasm is frequent, becomes a turning point in the relations between partners. If your man begins to defend or goes to grukhy protection, perhaps, it is worth addressing the sexopathologist. And if it does not help, perhaps, the partner is simply not ready to the mature sexual relations and you should look for others embraces.