After news of pregnancy of the wife some men are frightened, someone from them rejoices to long-awaited happiness, and someone plunges into a depression, trying to get over paternity. But nobody can realize at once that this concept actually means.
Instruction
1. Understanding of paternity does not come for short term. All nine months that pregnancy of the woman lasts, the man should get used to her condition, differences of mood, hysterics, strange desires and trips on hospitals. And also to a thought that he will become a father. To realize it happens not so simply, it changes habitual tenor of life, confers heavy responsibility on the man as the head of family.
2. However pregnancy of the woman gives necessary time in order that the man could be prepared for emergence in family of the new member. And business concerns not only purchases of new things, but also understanding of that fact that now the man will become a father. It is necessary women sometimes hardly during incubation of the child, it is heavy physically and morally, but they can not notice what so hard can have also to men. Those reinterpret own life and achievements, care for the future status, even sometimes begin to be jealous the spouse of future child.
3. It is not necessary at once to try to represent itself the father, for a start it is necessary to get over the child. He anyway will cause a storm of emotions, regardless of a spirit of future father. Further it is worth recognizing that to be prepared fully for appearance of the kid it will not turn out how many books you read and how many councils of skilled friends listened. Everything cannot be learned in advance while the kid does not appear at home. And then it is already necessary to try a lot of things in practice therefore be not afraid to take the child on hands, to bathe him, to play with him or to rock to sleep. But even the moment of appearance of the kid on light and the joy of a meeting with it is not done of the man of the real father yet and do not help to realize up to the end themselves that.
4. The real understanding comes later, after 1-2 months of stay of the child in the house, after sleepless nights and manifestation of care of the woman and the kid, after difficulties and even possible quarrels. It is not given simply, but the feeling when the child for the first time recognizes the father and smiles to it, unusually. And it is possible to forgive for it inconveniences and other troubles.
5. Even if in the first weeks of life of the child of the relation with the spouse do not develop, the child seems to strangers not similar to you, it is not necessary to despair. This absolutely normal phenomenon as all have a stress at this time. The main thing not to become isolated on own feelings and to understand that small life is near is what it is necessary to care now for and what should devote the time. Paternity is not just the status, it is connected with huge love and dedication of, the forces and time to the native kid. Only understanding it and accepting all difficulties as due, the man can understand for the sake of what he lives on light.