The frequent reason of complaints of parents is that children in process of their introduction in teenage age as if "get sick with unilateral deafness". That is do not hear the words of the adults turned into their address at all. At least, it seems so to parents.
Do not overestimate the requirement to the teenager!
In process of growing of the child begin to impose more and more requirements to it. The he becomes more senior, the more difficult and there are problems and tasks facing it and the it is more than alarms and fears causes its future in parents. It is absolutely natural. However it is very frequent, it conducts to the overestimated requirements. Parents act from good motives, seeking to prepare the child for difficulties of adulthood, and therefore wait that it will be successful and ideal in everything. The increased academic load, household chores, additional classes and sections – the mass of duties and requirements. And at this time the teenager is not physically not psychologically not ready to meet expectations and to carry out, everything that adults demand from him.
If you want the teenager to hear you – learn to listen to him!
The true requirement of its age is the need for communication. The most important task in terms of formation of the personality is to learn interaction in society, group, to gain experience of the trusting friendly relationship. Whereas from adults this requirement is in every possible way limited. From here and feeling of incomprehensibility, lostness, loneliness which teenagers face.
The condition of the teenager absolutely special, is the crisis period connected by strong psychoemotional loadings, physiological reorganization of an organism. Not for nothing sometimes the condition of the teenager is compared to a condition of the pregnant woman. Therefore when mental strain reaches there is nobody a maximum, in consciousness works as if a certain protective filter which tries to protect it from an excess stress. It is one of the causes of "deafness" when the teenager turns to the requirements turned to him a deaf ear. Learn to understand the teenager, to compare him to an opportunity, not only physical, but also mental with your requirements.
Right for free time
Besides, the teenage period – time of formation of a self-assessment and understanding by the identity of psychological borders. That is the teenager learns to have and lag behind the point of view. At this time he has also a need for personal time and own interests. For full development, it is impossible to deprive completely of the teenager of such opportunity and the right. It has to have an opportunity to walk after school, to communicate with peers, to read books interesting to it, to watch movies, etc., and not just to study, to carry out household chores.
Sign "contract"
Sign "contract" with the teenager - make behind family council the contract with the teenager where discuss not only his rights, but also your requirements which he undertakes to carry out. Also surely discuss the system of penalties for failure to follow the obligations. Punishment should not be physical, humiliate the child. In quality nakazny it is possible to offer reduction of time of games and walks with peers, uses of the computer, etc.