It is unlikely there is heavier threat to the relations, than treason from the loved one. Treason can unsettle for a long time. The offense, pain, misunderstanding – all this does not give pleasure. But if this trouble occurred, then how to cope with it? And whether it is possible to forgive treason of darling?
Instruction
1. In an adultery situation those who were influenced by treachery most often ask for the help the psychologist. And, as a rule, women address. Men can try to celebrate with treason of the second half independently, often by means of available "improvised" means", such as alcohol. Certainly, it is always an incorrect way to recovery of composure.
2. Treason is always a crisis situation. It is followed by quite often intra personal conflict. How in the circumstances to be farther? To forgive or not to forgive? And maybe, it is necessary to revenge for the scolded relations? These and similar questions often arise against the background of the raged emotions.
3. The one who tries to find for himself the corresponding answers often is not able to cope with this task. Pain of treason narrows ability to soberly assess a situation, to plan the further behavior in relation to the betrayed partner.
4. Main issue: to forgive or not to forgive treason? How you to answer for itself this question, often depends on a condition of formation of your personality in childhood. Remember those situations from the childhood when you had to have sense of guilt for pranks or more serious offenses. If you were forgiven by parents, it meant that you are accepted it what you are, with all your weaknesses and shortcomings.
5. But deceived person is in a treason situation before need to forgive to wine of another. And how to be with indelible offense, fear to remain alone, lack of former cordial relations in family? Moreover quite often the conflict is entered by doubts concerning whether it is worth keeping family further.
6. Alas, universal recipes how to build further life and the relations after treason, do not exist. And the person who appeared in so difficult life situation should accept crucial decisions independently. Including, it is necessary most to take responsibility for these decisions.
7. The most general recommendations concern only ways of reaction in a sharp phase of a situation. First of all, it is necessary to come to more equal state, to remove excessive emotions. Try to understand for what to you the situation with treason from above is lowered. Whether something could provoke it in your own behavior? To critically estimate itself and the behavior in the conflict.
8. Find an opportunity to be uttered. Not so important, who will become a listener – the professional psychologist, mother or the close girlfriend. You need to speak aloud what you feel in relation to a treason situation. In the majority it the otreagirovaniye of emotions allows to remove sharpness of experiences and to remove inevitable consequences of a harmful stress.
9. The main thing governed – be careful immediately to make fast, hasty and emotional decisions. Unfortunately, consequences of not quite considered acts are not always easy to be corrected.